


The Specter

by CassadyFlies



Category: No. 6 - All Media Types
Genre: Capitalism, Communism, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-08-23 07:11:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16614305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CassadyFlies/pseuds/CassadyFlies
Summary: No. 6 senator Shion is running for president when an old ally turns out to be an activist for the other side. When there's only one option left for Nezumi, Shion's life is on the line.Some good old canon-typical darkness mixed with slightly more than canon-typical gayness. Be gay, do crimes everyone. That's my motto.





	1. Chapter 1

The ever-present hum of the electric generator that pumped beneath the floorboards of the campaign house ceased suddenly, the lack of sound waking the inadvertently napping Shion who slumped behind a computer at his desk, blue colored bumper-sticker emblazoned with his own face stuck to his cheek. He jerked up quickly from his rest and peeled the sticker off his skin. He blinked in the unexpected darkness and looked around himself, confused.

“Hello?”

He tapped a few keys on his keyboard, trying to wake the dark screen of his computer, to no avail.

“Power’s out!” called a female voice from the next room.

“Yeah…” Shion tapped fruitlessly on his keyboard again, as if that might solve the problem. “Where’s the breaker?”

“I’ll get it!” she called back. Her high-heeled footsteps clicked off into the distance until there was silence. A long moment passed before she could be heard returning. “Breaker didn’t do anything!” She opened the door to Shion’s office. “Why are your curtains drawn?”

“I didn’t want to see them,” Shion sighed, glancing at the shaded window.

“They’re gone, Senator,” the woman replied. “It’s almost eleven o’ clock.”

Protestors had been flooding the streets around his campaign house for days. They came and went, and Shion was avoiding them as much as possible. It was nasty politics. Screaming hysterics from the opposition, calling him a party traitor and worse. Presidential elections did this to people. Where had they been when he was being elected senator? Not paying attention, most likely. Now that he was running for president, everything was different. He was hated across the city of No. 6, by more than thirty percent of the people.

Ever since the wall had fallen, Shion’s life had been nothing but chaos. The Outsiders and the Insiders  _ hated  _ each other with a passion that can only be felt by those who have been taught from birth to hate. And since the formation of a legitimate democracy, they had divided themselves along party lines. The Outsiders had for the most part become the Communists, and had hailed Shion as the champion of the Proletariat. The Insiders had for the most part become the Liberals, and had reviled Shion as a traitor to his city.

The thing was, Shion  _ wasn’t  _ a Communist. He was actually rather centrist, a progressive Liberal, supporter of a Social (yet capitalist) Democracy.

Once this had become clear, the parties had flipped their views. Shion was the hero of the Liberals, an advocate for the free-market, a true representative for the city he’d been raised in.

Shion was running for president as a Liberal. And this garnered nothing but hatred from the Communists he’d once appeared to represent.

“I’ll call an electrician.” The woman tapped on her wristband, which illuminated her face in a bluish glow. Bluish. That was Shion. Blue, not red. Not a Communist. True-blue Insider campaigning on behalf of the other Insiders who comprised the vast majority of the Liberal party.

A few minutes later, the electrician arrived. It was a small robot, barely three inches tall, that could extend to reach even the highest corners of the campaign house if it so chose. The electrician whirred and sputtered as it darted around the house, searching for the source of the electrical disruption.

“Your electrical lines have been severed and burned,” the robot said eventually, in an almost human voice. “Calling a human repairperson, arrival time thirty minutes.”

“Severed and burned?” Shion repeated incredulously. “By whom?”

The robot didn’t answer. It simply spun around and whizzed off out the door, its job done.

“This is an act of sabotage,” the woman growled angrily. “Those socialist scumbags did this.”

Shion remained silent. Probably, he figured, that was the case. They were known to take matters into their own hands, the Communists. It was part of their agenda.

“I’ll check the security footage.” She tapped on her wristband and began scrubbing through tape.

“They always wear masks,” Shion muttered softly. “We’ll never recognize them.”

“Found it!” the woman said after a while. “Screenshotted. I’ll send it in to the police.” She tapped on her wristband a few more times, and sighed with satisfaction. “It may not be much to go off of, but I trust in the cops.” She turned her wrist around to show Shion the picture. “Looks like two young men in black. Red bandanas over their faces, but their eyes are visible.” She zoomed in on the picture. “Maybe that will be enough to get an ID.”

Shion glanced at the picture. “Mhm. Maybe. Though I think it’s probably futile.” Two skinny men, one with pale, one with light brown skin, caught in the act of cutting and melting his utility wires. The artificial intelligence of the security cameras had focused in on their faces, but it was impossible to tell who they were.

The woman scrubbed backwards through the footage, and Shion watched as they walked backwards away from the wires as the lights came back on. The brown-skinned one looked at the camera as the light illuminated his face.

Shion’s heart shuddered to a stop as he stared in disbelief at the frozen image.

“Screenshot,” the woman commanded, taking a picture of the vandal’s face. “You can even tell his eye color, that might be useful for an ID.”

Light gray eyes stared into the camera, tying Shion’s tongue and halting his breath. “S-s-” He stumbled over his words. “Send me that image.”

“Can do.” The woman clicked a couple times, and the image appeared on Shion’s wristband projection. “Do you know who that is?”

Shion zoomed in on Nezumi’s face, and shook his head. “No idea,” he whispered, then cleared his throat. “You can go home, Alicia, thanks for staying so late. I didn’t mean to keep you.”

“You sure you don’t want me to wait for the human repairperson?”

“No, it’s fine. I’ll call secret service, they can stay with me until it’s time to go home.”

Alicia nodded. “Have a good night, Shion.”

“You too.” Shion grabbed onto the edge of his desk after Alicia left the room. He felt nauseous. There was no denying what he saw in that image, and the implications were dizzying.

Nezumi was back. He was with the Communists. He was with the  _ anarchists.  _ And he was angry at Shion.

Shion stumbled back to his desk and sat down, burying his head in his hands. Why hadn’t Nezumi approached him? Why had he immediately jumped to the conclusion that Shion was not to be reasoned with? Why go directly to petty vandalism? And now that Shion had identified him, what was he to do with the information? Surely, he shouldn’t turn Nezumi in to the police. Right? Or should he? After all they’d been through those seven years ago, could he really just give him up to the authorities?

Shion stewed in thought until the repairperson knocked on the door.

Shion trudged out to greet him. “Hello.”

“Hello, Senator. I hear you’ve had a bit of a vandal problem?”

“Yes.” Shion nodded. “Please, come in.”

The repairperson wiped his feet on the mat and stepped over the threshold. “I’m afraid that I won’t be able to do anything more than get a reading today. From the looks of the pictures, it’ll probably take about three days to get the parts made, and a fourth to instal the new wires.”

“You’re kidding,” Shion gaped. “Four days? Will I have to shut down operations?”

“That’s up to you,” the repairperson shrugged. “But you can’t run from here, probably.”

Shion cursed under his breath. “Okay. Okay. We’ll figure something out. Thank you.” He rubbed his eyes. “Is… is there any way I could go home now? The doors lock automatically, so you could just let yourself out.”

“Again, your call.” The repairperson sniffed. “I can get the reading done on my own, you don’t need to stay up past your bedtime on my account, Senator.” He laughed a booming laugh.

Shion nodded. “Okay. Thank you for your work.” Shion shook the man’s hand and shuffled out the front door. He was developing a migraine.

It was only a five minute walk back to his apartment, but Shion had to sit down on a bench halfway there. He felt physically ill. His head hurt, his stomach was churning, and his limbs felt weak. Besides which, he had an uncanny feeling like Nezumi might jump out of the bushes and confront him at any moment.

He didn’t realize he was about to cry until an unexpected sob escaped his throat. He’d had a tough week. The protests against him were only building, he’d been smeared on every Communist news channel, and he was even gaining notoriety outside of No. 6. Now, on top of all that, he was going to have to move his campaign somewhere else? That meant either paying out of their funds, or running from his house, which would draw the protestors to his doorstep. Not to mention the fact that Nezumi was back, which was an entire other can of emotional worms he didn’t want to open at the moment.

Shion’s eyes prickled with frustrated tears. He loved his city, but this was getting to be a lot. He needed a vacation. But where to go that nobody would recognize and hate him? The places on Earth were becoming fewer and fewer.

Shakily, he climbed to his feet and walked the rest of the way home. He needed to sleep. He needed to sleep until the sun was high in the sky. He needed a full day’s rest.

Instead, he twisted open a new fifth of vodka and drank straight from the bottle, holding his breath out of habit, though he was so out of it he wouldn’t have noticed the burn.

The warmth spread throughout his body. He drank a little more and closed the bottle.

“If you Commies have bugged my house,” he spoke out to the room, swaying on his feet. “Know that this isn’t because of you. I’m not drinking because of you. And I’m not drinking because of  _ you  _ either,” he declared to Nezumi. “I know you’re listening. You’ve always been listening. Ever since I was  _ twelve,  _ right? You had mice in my house. Now you’ve got bugs in my apartment.” He sniffed, holding back sudden tears. “Do you still hate No. 6? After all we’ve done to change it? Do you still hate me?” His bottom lip quivered. “I’m a  _ Liberal,  _ a member of the Bourgeoisie, and I’m fighting to  _ keep it that way  _ at the expense of the poor, oppressed proletariat. I’m a fascist. I’m evil. I’m everything you hate. Right?” He stared around the room like someone might actually respond to him. “You don’t even live here and you still are fighting to keep me out of office. Or… you do live here and you never thought to come see me. Never thought to try and reason with me, am I so beyond reason?!” He blinked. “Ah, but isn’t that just it? We’re all beyond reason. We’re human. And Humanity is why Communism won’t win. You idealist! It’s all pretty words and petty action, it’s childish. We did so much better at sixteen, you’ve devolved. You’re everything you accused me of being. Naive. Idealistic. Sheltered in my echochamber and rash in my political action.” He was starting to really feel the alcohol. He ran his finger through his hair, messing it up so it stood on end. “And to think I ever…” He shook his head. “Cared about you.”

Guilt suddenly ate him from the ground up. He whispered, “I do. I do, I… I’m sorry. I’m drunk. It’s late. You pissed me off. Just… please come see me. Please, just come back. Come back. Please.”

 

******

 

“Come back. Please.”

Nezumi shut off the monitor and forced a laugh. “Well, that was certainly interesting. Took him long enough to figure out I’m here.” He stuck a cigarette in his mouth and lit it with a steel lighter. “What a day.”

A tall, slender man of 24 named Jay sat down on the couch next to Nezumi and put an arm around his shoulder. “Mmm, I see the appeal.”

“What, of Shion?”

“Yeah.” Jay smirked, pulling the cigarette out of Nezumi’s mouth and taking a drag. “It’s kinda hot, in a pathetic way. Scared, overwhelmed little bougie boy from the inside, crying about capitalism. I could hate-fuck him.”

“You could fuck anything.” Nezumi swiped his cigarette back and shoved Jay lightly.

Jay pointed a finger-gun at the monitor. “Pop, pop,” he mimicked the sound of a gun firing as he kicked back his hand. “I hate him so  _ much,  _ doesn’t that just turn you on?”

“Hatred?”

_ “Yessss…”  _ Jay leaned into Nezumi’s side. “He’s Bourgeois scum, but I want him to suck my dick and call me comrade.”

Nezumi took a long draw on his cigarette, pursing his lips and thinking about it. “Saying things like,” he lowered his voice and whispered seductively, “The rich work hard for what they have, it’s the entitled poor who are the problem.”

Jay groaned loudly. “I’m gonna fucking cum.  _ Capitalist boys!”  _ He buried his face in Nezumi’s neck and inhaled deeply. “Fuck me now, I’m ready.”

“You’re disgusting.” Nezumi shook his head, leaning away. “Shion’s the enemy, we can’t get attached.”

“I’m not attached.” Jay raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t you listening? I wanna fuck him  _ because  _ he’s the enemy. Fuck him, then put a 410 through his brain. Make him suck the barrel of my Colt.”

Nezumi nodded quietly, crossing his eyes slightly to watch the uneven ring of ash around the end of his hand-rolled cigarette.

Jay laughed. “Don’t be jealous, babe, Shion will always love you and only you. And so will I.” He kissed Nezumi’s neck, and licked a stripe down to his shoulder.

Nezumi rolled his eyes. “I don’t care about him any more. Not since he defected.”

“Your lies are making me horny.”

“It’s not a lie. And everything makes you horny.” Nezumi stood, ashing his cigarette in an empty coffee cup.

“You’re telling me that if given the opportunity you wouldn’t gang bang Shion with me? Hold him down and empty your righteous indignation into his mouth?” Jay knelt down in front of Nezumi, reaching out to place his hands on Nezumi’s thighs.

He’d be lying to himself if he said a small shudder didn’t pass through his body at the visual. “I’m a sapiosexual,” Nezumi insisted. “I wouldn’t fuck anyone so stupid as a Capitalist.”

Jay stood up. “Yeah? You exclusively fuck your comrades?” He stepped far into Nezumi’s personal space. “Hello, comrade.”

Nezumi gave. He stood and closed the small gap between him and Jay, pressing their lips together. Jay’s tongue quickly found its way into Nezumi’s mouth as he rolled their bodies together.

“Alright. Break it up, boys.” A young woman named Hoshi said as she walked into the room.

Jay groaned. “God  _ damn  _ it, Hoshi! Every time!”

Hoshi laughed. “Oh I am  _ so  _ sure I have not broken you two up every time.” She flopped down on the couch. “How’d the op go?”

Nezumi sat down next to her and started rolling another cigarette. “It’s going well so far. The “repairperson” is still stealing the data off his hard drives. And Shion knows it was me.”

“Not as dumb as his politics make him look, then.” Hoshi nodded. “Good. I really thought you were being too subtle.”

“I looked right at the camera,” Nezumi reminded her. “He knows my eyes.”

“He really  _ is  _ in love with you,” Jay teased, sitting down next to Nezumi. “Hilarious. It’s like Romeo and Juliet.”

“Romeo and Juliet died for each other. I wouldn’t die for him.”

Jay coughed.

“What?” Nezumi asked suspiciously.

“I mean… didn’t you? Almost, at least? When you tore down the wall?”

Nezumi opened his mouth to argue, thought about it, and closed his mouth.

“Ha,” Jay said dryly.

“That was then. This is now. He could be president.” Nezumi switched back on the monitor. “He can’t be president.”

Shion was laying shirtless on the couch, his hair a mess and tear stains on his face.

“See what I mean, Hoshi? Hot in a pathetic way.” Jay zoomed in on Shion, who was nursing a bottle of vodka between his knees.

“Shut up, Jay.” Hoshi said bluntly. “We’re trying to work.”

Shion lifted the bottle back to his lips. He must be pretty drunk by now. Nezumi had once seen him get wasted on half a bottle of wine, now he could drink half a fifth of vodka? Times really had changed.

Shion capped the bottle and set it on the floor, shoving it away from himself with his foot.

“I hate you,” Shion’s voice came through the speakers of Nezumi’s monitor. “Why do you do these things to me?”

“Poor little Capitalist boy,” Jay said mockingly. “You deserve all you’re getting.”

Nezumi nodded in agreement.

“Just come  _ talk  _ to me,” Shion pleaded.

Nezumi swallowed roughly. He really did want to. He wanted to go say hello, talk things out, and convince Shion to see things the right way. That would be ideal. But it wouldn’t work. Debate never solved a thing, people were too entrenched in their views. As long as it was impossible for Shion to talk Nezumi out of Anarcho-Communism, it was impossible for Nezumi to talk Shion out of Late-Stage-Capitalism. Their little stunt today had been the closest they would ever get to meeting in person. At least for a very long time. Nezumi was perfectly willing to meet Shion on stage and scream things into a microphone alongside him. Because that wasn’t about trying to convince Shion, it was about trying to convince the people. The people could be persuaded in some cases, especially when it suited their own best interests. Those class traitors from the outside who believed in capitalism, they could still be made to see the light. Even some intelligent, empathetic Bourgeoisie could be converted. It was all a matter of constant action and fact-checking of the Capitalists. Sometimes peaceful means worked. That’s why it’s called  _ diversity  _ of tactics, not violence-only. Not peace-only either. These were revolutionary times. If Nezumi was ever going to meet Shion again in person and keep his promise, it was going to be at the clashing point, the place where these two waves- red and blue- collided and one overtook the other. It was going to be when one of them died.

Nezumi was 23. He was old enough, in his eyes, to die. Not that age has much to do with death. Anyone can die at any time for any reason. That’s what Nezumi had always known.

“The op won’t put him out of commission for long. He uses super-PACs, he’s going to easily have enough money to fix everything and continue working. We’ll have to see what our next step is when Rainen comes back with the stolen hard drive.” Nezumi cracked his back and stood. Shion wasn’t going to say anything else interesting tonight. He was too drunk to be trusted, and in all likelihood he was just going to spend the night puking in the bathroom. Nezumi had seen it all before. Shion was weak. He let things like this get to him.

“I agree. I say we see what Rainen says tonight, then go to bed and plan our next step tomorrow morning. The people should still be peacefully protesting, so I want to wake up early so we can have an Anarcho presence in the demonstration.” Jay stood too, taking Nezumi’s hand. “Have you eaten today?”

“Yeah, earlier.” Nezumi dismissed. He didn’t like people worrying about him. “Rainen probably won’t be back for at least an hour, I’m going to bed.” He pulled his hand out of Jay’s and walked off towards the bunks.

“Oh, I’ll come with you.” Jay trotted after him.

“Please don’t have sex in the communal bunks,” Hoshi sighed.

Jay looked annoyed. “Then where are we  _ supposed  _ to have sex? The single bedroom? Isn’t that full right now?”

“It’s just that people walk in and out of there all the time, and-”

“So? I don’t care if people see us.” Jay rolled his eyes. “You’ve got a lot of internalized shit to work out, Hosh.”

Hoshi hesitated, then sighed. “Just try to keep it quiet.”

“I dunno about Jay, but  _ I’m  _ actually going to sleep,” Nezumi said, raising an eyebrow at the two of them.

“Wha- aw.” Jay looked disappointed. “You’re no fun.”

“I don’t care, I’m exhausted. Plus, I’m going to the protest tomorrow morning, and I have to wake up at five.” Nezumi turned and strode out of the room, opening the door to the bunks and sitting down on his own to take off his steel-toed jackboots.

Jay sat down next to him. “Let me suck your dick. It’ll put you to sleep.” He leaned in and kissed Nezumi’s cheek. “Always does.”

“Not into it.”

“Oh, come on. You don’t even have to reciprocate.” Jay ran his fingers through Nezumi’s short hair, messing it up so his curls stood on end. He unzipped Nezumi’s cargo pants.

The sound of the zipper triggered a pavlovian response in Nezumi’s body. He bit his lip. “Fine.”

Jay laughed triumphantly. “Knew you’d say yes.” He knelt down in front of Nezumi at the side of the bed, rubbing Nezumi lightly over his pants.

Nezumi rolled his eyes and stripped out of his clothes. He bit back a moan as Jay stroked him to full hardness before leaning down and putting his mouth to work.

Images of Shion flashed before Nezumi’s closed eyes. Crying, drunk, and half-naked lying on the couch. He had to admit Jay was right. It was an appealing image. Seven minutes later when he came down the back of Jay’s throat, Shion’s was the name on Nezumi’s lips. Jay laughed and shoved Nezumi down into bed shouting, “I knew it!” as he smothered Nezumi’s neck with kisses. They fell asleep like that, tangled up together, only moments later. It was late. They were tired. Tomorrow was a big day.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Shion woke up hungover to the sounds of people chanting outside his house. He put a hand over his mouth as he swallowed repeatedly against the urge to gag. How much had he drunk? Too much, clearly. His dreams had been vodka-flavored, trippy and nauseating. Now he had to wake up and immediately deal with this? How inconvenient.

He struggled to down a meager breakfast, which all came back up in the shower a few minutes later. He immediately felt better. He swallowed a handful of pills from his medicine cabinet and dressed himself slowly. No reason to rush a bad morning.

“Whose streets? Our streets! Whose streets? Our streets!” The chanting continued as Shion looked out the window to see a bunch of red-clad protestors resisting arrest by the police for blocking traffic.

“Maybe I should stay home today,” Shion murmured. It’s not like he had a campaign office to go to. He had been planning on going to the senate building, but there weren’t any important votes today anyway. Just a bunch of budgetary stuff they didn’t really need him for.

“Fuck the police! Fuck the police! Fuck the police!” The chant changed as sirens blared, giving the protestors one last warning before they were arrested.

The sound of the siren went straight to Shion’s head, aching and pounding. Yeah. He was staying home. No way he was going to make it into work, not with-

His eyes landed on a group of protestors in masks, some in bandanas, some in respirators, some in ski-masks. Was Nezumi one of them? Shion couldn’t see from so far away. He scanned their group, looking for long hair and brown skin. That described several of them. Besides, he wasn’t even sure Nezumi still had long hair. It had been seven years after all.

In a moment of irrational decision making, Shion burst out onto his second-story balcony to the sound of boos and hisses. “Antifa!” Shion called out to the group. “You’re welcome inside!”

The crowd got silent as the masked activists looked confusedly at each other. “Really?” One of them asked.

“Yes! But only if all of you come.” Shion tapped on his wristband and the main entrance to the apartment building buzzed. “Unit 207 B.”

They rushed the door as the rest of the crowd murmured, perplexed.

Only one antifa activist was left standing away from his comrades. A brown-skinned boy with a hood over his head and a red bandana over his mouth and nose glared up at Shion in silence.

A slow grin spread over Shion’s face. “You have to come too, or I’m not letting your comrades in.”

The boy continued to glare.

“You’re not saying anything because I’ll recognize your voice, right?” Shion challenged. “What’s it worth  to you? Meeting with me?”

“Go!” One of the other protestors cried.

The antifa boy’s eyebrows contracted angrily, and he stormed towards the door. Grinning, Shion unlocked his apartment and let the crowd inside.

“Who wants to say something to me?” He threw his arms open wide, feeling much less sick now.

One older woman in goggles and a respirator stepped forward. “How does capitalism plan to contend with technology slowly replacing human labor?”

Shion nodded. “Good question. Humans will begin to work more and more skilled jobs for fewer hours as the robots continue to develop.”

“But what about when the robots completely replace all but the owners of the means of production?” she stepped closer.

“Well, we’ll all have to own means of production. I’m also not against universal basic income, as long as it doesn’t prevent people from working.”

“That’s fucking stupid,” she flipped him off.

“Anyone else?” Shion looked towards the back of the crowd, where he spotted Nezumi sulking. “What about you?”

Nezumi shook his head silently.

“Look, I know it’s you, you don’t have to play this game. I know you were in my campaign office yesterday. You cut my utility wires.”

Nezumi shook his head again.

“You and that other man, you know I didn’t turn you in. I could.”

Nezumi shrugged.

Anger boiled in Shion’s veins. “You were  _ my  _ comrade before you were theirs. And now you won’t even speak to me? These stupid missions- all about disrupting our democracy. You people don’t play fair, you’re like children. Crying when you don’t get your way. I thought you were better than that, Nezumi.”

In one quick motion, Nezumi pulled off his mask and stormed to the front of the crowd. “I thought  _ you  _ were better than this! I trusted you, and you betrayed the cause. You don’t care about wealth inequality, you don’t care about the people you tried to save, all you care about is maintaining your rank among the bourgeois. You think we’re childish because you treat us like children, unworthy of equality to you. You think you worked hard for what you got, but it was  _ given  _ to you freely by your upbringing in Chronos. By your status as a true citizen of No. 6. This is not the behavior of a child, this is the outrage of the 99%, those who  _ never  _ had the capital to become what you are, and those who would gladly trade in their privilege for the chance to look at themselves in the mirror without wanting to kill themselves out of shame. You Liberals stand for more diversity among the oppressors, you want the outsiders to become one of you so you can show that hard work leads to success. That’s tokenism, and it’s disgusting. I’d  _ never  _ want success at the expense of my people. Communism is an inevitability, revolt is coming. Hell, it’s here. You don’t want me to break my promise? You think I’m a liar? Well, here I am. I was staying away for  _ your  _ sake. And I don’t want your compassion, so turn me in if you think it was me who broke into your office. I won’t accept favors from you. How dare you condescend to me?!” He spat on the floor and turned on his heel to stride out the front door, slamming it behind himself.

Shion smiled. “He cut his hair.”

A light-skinned boy looked back and forth between where Nezumi had left and where Shion stood. “Uh… I’m gonna follow him out, I guess. I just wanna say before I go that Shion- you’re dangerously attractive and I super hate you, but I still would. Peace.” He held up two fingers and dashed out the door after Nezumi.

Shion shook his head in amazement. “Well, I said you all had to be here, so get out or get arrested.”

The crowd murmured amongst themselves before coming to a conclusion. “We’ll get arrested.”

Shion shrugged. “Your decision.” He called the cops on his wristband and sat down on the couch to wait.

An old man in a ski mask sat down gingerly next to him. “Young man, may I speak with you for a bit?”

Shion nodded.

“I’ve lived my entire life up until very recently as a capitalist  _ and  _ a proletariat. I thought the only chains that bound me were the ones I had put there myself, through my own deficiencies. I thought I didn’t deserve a good life because I wasn’t good enough. It’s only because of you and your actions to break down the wall that I’ve realized my mistake. I  _ am  _ deserving of a decent life, and the bourgeoisie are diametrically opposed to the proletariat in our current system. That young man you spoke to- the one you called Nezumi- if his actions seem unfair to you, it’s because you’re sitting in a position of privilege compared to him. Equality to the privileged looks like theft. He’s living in a system that treats him like he’s unworthy of basic human rights. When he lashes out against you, it’s only him fighting for his very survival in any small way he can. The fighting is only going to get worse. Have you heard the quote by Marx,  _ The ruling ideas of each age have ever been the ideas of its ruling class.  _ Well, capitalism is the idea of the Capitalists. It is the clinging to power of the bourgeoisie, the desperate and doomed grasp towards power by the few at the expense of the many. This is why we socialists think that revolution is the only answer. That capitalism cannot be solved within a capitalist framework. In fact, revolution is, in some sense, an inevitability. We will fight as we die, and we will die as we fight. This is why I have changed my views so late in life. As I die, I want to make sure I don’t die in vain. I want to die fighting, like the human I am.”

Shion nodded. “Thank you for sharing.”

The police arrived moments later, and arrested the protestors. They were led out single file as cameras swarmed them. Shion stayed inside, not wanting to be seen on the news with them.

“We  _ had  _ our revolution,” Shion whispered to himself, thinking of Nezumi. “Why can’t they just be happy?

 

******

 

Nezumi was pacing back and forth furiously, grumbling to himself as Jay watched him from the couch.

“Babe, relax. You said your piece.”

“He had them all  _ arrested?!”  _ Nezumi exclaimed. “After he invited them in?!”

“Legit, take a chill pill.”

Nezumi stopped pacing. “Do you have any?”

Jay tilted his head. “Any…?”

“Xanax?”

Jay laughed. “You fucking pill junkie, of course I do.” He stuck his hand in one of the many, deep pockets of his cargo pants and pulled out a small bag of pills, taking out two rectangle-shaped ones and placing them in Nezumi’s palm. “I keep them for you.”

Nezumi swiped a bottle of tequila off the table and downed the pills with a couple shots. “Distract me for fifteen minutes until it kicks in.”

“Ooh, I could think of a few ways.” Jay took Nezumi’s hands and pulled him down onto the couch. “How do you want to do this?”

“I don’t care, just fuck me before I rage punch the wall of this FUCKING BUNKER WE’RE CONFINED TO!” Nezumi slammed his fist into the wall, pulling back reddened knuckles.

“Careful, save your rage for the rich.” Jay kissed Nezumi’s bruised hand. “Take off your clothes.”

Nezumi stripped down to nothing, hands shaking with anger as he did so.

Jay took off his clothes too, admiring Nezumi’s body. “You’re so fucking hot.”

“He’s gonna be president.” Alcohol swum in Nezumi’s head. “He’s gonna be president.”

“Mhm,” Jay agreed, laying kisses down Nezumi’s chest. “Probably.”

Nezumi gasped as Jay reached between his legs and started stroking firmly. “We should assassinate him.”

“Yeah, baby, whatever you say.” Jay fished around in a pocket of his discarded cargo pants and pulled out a small bottle of lotion. “Let’s murder the bastard. Lay down.”

Nezumi lay down on the couch and closed his eyes, picturing it. “Smash capitalism. Kill Shion.”

“God, I love you so much. You fucking terrorist.” Jay rubbed at Nezumi’s entrance, eyelids hooded. “My radical leftist revolutionary  _ terrorist.” _ He grinded down into Nezumi with a groan. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Nezumi felt like he was losing his mind. The alcohol was hitting him full swing, and his body hummed with sex. “I was in love with him.” He groaned as Jay stuck a finger inside him. “I was so in love with him.”

Jay didn’t look like he was listening. His eyes were nearly closed and he just nodded in agreement with what Nezumi was saying. “Mhm.” He inserted another finger.

“He saved my life. And now I gotta kill him.” Nezumi moaned as Jay hit his prostate. “Fuck me.”

“Yeah, babe. Okay.” Jay withdrew his fingers and pressed the head of his cock against Nezumi’s entrance. “Deep breath.”

Nezumi called out into the empty bunker as Jay pushed inside of him. “I’m gonna assassinate Shion!” He felt like crying. “Oh my god!” He grabbed the bottle of tequila off the table and poured some into his mouth as Jay thrusted slowly. “I’m gonna do it.”

“That’s sexy as fuck.” Jay moaned.

“Choke me and call me a terrorist,” Nezumi commanded, grabbing onto Jay’s bicep.

Jay’s jaw fell slack as he shuddered. “Oh god, yes.” He wrapped his fingers around Nezumi’s throat and squeezed lightly.

“Fucking harder,” Nezumi insisted.

Jay squeezed a bit tighter, thrusting his hips forward sharply. “Nnnnh…”

“I want to pass out, Jay. Knock me the fuck out.” Nezumi grabbed Jay’s hands around his throat and forced him to squeeze tighter until the blood vessels to his brain were constricted. He let go as Jay finally gave it his all, groaning and squeezing tightly.

“You’re a fucking terrorist, Nezumi. You always were. You knocked down the wall to No. 6, and now you’re going to kill the ex-comrade who helped you. You’re a terrorist and a radical revolutionary leftist queer. You’re everything the right hates, and you’re a  _ fucking terrorist.” _

His words went straight to Nezumi’s groin. “Nnngh- I’m gonna kill Shion.”

“Yeah, you are.” Jay looked down at him with such love in his eyes.

“I’m gonna blow up the president’s office the day he steps into his seat. Kill his entire Liberal cabinet.”

Jay squeezed a little tighter, and Nezumi couldn’t speak anymore. He felt dizzy, and also incredibly turned-on.

Jay thrust mercilessly into Nezumi, never breaking eye contact. It felt good to be so owned, so dominated. “No peaceful road to socialism.  Just terrorism and revolution from here on out.”

Nezumi was starting to see spots. He thought about Shion, how much he hated him, and how much he wanted him to suffer. It was enough to put him over the edge, and he came with a strangled groan. He felt dizzy, and gasped for breath that would not come as Jay continued pumping into him with vigor until he too came with a cry and let go.

The sudden rush of oxygen smacked Nezumi like a blow to the head, and as the xanax he’d taken began to kick in, his eyes fluttered closed and he blacked out.

When he came to moments later, Jay was shaking him. “You okay?”

Nezumi slurred, “Yeah mhm fantastic.” His head was ringing with drugs, sex, and anoxia. “Floaty.”

Jay smiled. “As beautiful as you look naked, high, and covered in cum, I think we should clean you up and move you to the bunks.”

Nezumi didn’t want to move. He was rooted to the spot. “Uh-uh.” His head was expanding into the universe, and his body was becoming one with the couch.

“Yeah, babe. It’s time to move. Before the rest get out of jail and come back.”

He was right. Nezumi sat up slowly, feeling the world spin around him. He felt sated and relaxed.

A few minutes later, cleaned up and dressed again, Nezumi swayed as he walked over to Jay and wrapped his arms around him. “Brother, comrade, friend- I love you.”

“Oh-ho kay.” Jay laughed, hugging him back.

“Will you help me kill the man I used to love?” Nezumi looked at Jay seriously, though his vision was distorted from alcohol and drugs. He put his hands on Jay’s shoulders and squeezed tightly. “He needs to die.”

Jay hesitated. “I…”

“It’s the revolution, comrade!” Nezumi insisted. “You must be willing to die, be willing to kill for the cause. It’s the only way we don’t sink into oblivion. Humanity  _ must  _ persist, and there  _ must  _ be sacrifices.”

“It’s not just Shion’s life we’d be sacrificing.”

“It’s our own.” Nezumi nodded. “I know. We’d be killed by the state. Don’t you think it’s worth it?”

“He’s… he’s not a  _ fascist,  _ though.”

“Capitalism enables fascism!” Nezumi declared, shaking Jay slightly. “Aren’t you willing to die for what’s right?”

“You’re high. Think about it tomorrow,” Jay suggested. Nezumi hesitated, and that was all Jay needed. “Sit down. I’ll make you some coffee. Maybe get you a cold compress.”

“I don’t want to be sober. I don’t want to think clearly right now.” Nezumi scowled, wanting to be consumed by rage, and being prevented from doing so by the drugs. “I want to kill our next president. There are two parties in this city, and one of them has never had a presidential representative. Why is that?”

“Because… there’s only been two terms since the fall?”

“Because you cannot elect a true socialist leader by means of a capitalist system. The system is inherently and entirely skewed in their favor. Anyone with enough money to game the system and become president will become corrupted by their own capitalistic success. Shion’s a lost cause. We can’t reason with him. He will be president, and the second he’s sworn in we attack.”

Jay sat in silence for a long moment before he spoke, and when he did, his voice was quiet. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Nezumi nodded. “Okay.”


	3. Chapter 3

“Good morning, and thank you all for coming out on such a dreary day. That just goes to show the unyielding spirit of the Capitalist party. Thank you for participating in this rally, and a special thank you to all of our hardworking volunteers who make all this possible. I’d like to start by saying that the mudslinging by the Communists has gone too far. It’s petty, dirty politics, and I want nothing to do with it. Instead, I will be focussing on the principals of our party as opposed to theirs, in a genuine attempt to convince those of you still on the fence that Capitalism is the right way.

Firstly, I want to start with a critique of Communism. Though Marx was undoubtedly a brilliant thinker, there are several internal problems with the idea of communism. To say that the mode of production is the main source of human inequality- that’s simply incorrect. Human inequality is caused by human difference, and where we can do our best to correct for structural inequity, no system will be able to justly correct for human difference without the suppression of human rights. Marxism leads to a homogenization of thought, productivity, and lifestyle, leaving little room for personal choice.

Capitalism, on the other hand, thrives on human difference, and in fact celebrates it. Those who are born with superior ability will reap superior reward. Those who put in extra work will gain extra benefit. It’s egalitarian, and fair. While the ideal of communism sounds nice, it simply isn’t feasible in reality.

Communism also faces the fundamental problem of class. Without class, there is no economy, with no economy, there is no innovation. Thanks to the consumer, and thanks to the producer, we are able to have a rapidly evolving society full of interesting and useful new innovations that make our lives easier. Communism would stagnate us.

Under Capitalism, however, we thrive in a constantly fluctuating economy. Now, I will admit that being poor is difficult. It’s not nice, pretty, or wanted. However, we must accept that having a certain percentage of lower class people is a necessary evil. The poor in a compassionate Capitalist society are boosted beyond what they would have under Communism due to innovation by the business owning class. In Communism, everyone is equally oppressed.

Therefore, my solution for the problems of the working class is this: social safety nets. Rather than letting one fallen member of society take the rest of us down too, we simply provide a cushion and a means to climb back up. A progressive tax on the rich will pay for the necessary accommodations for the poor.

Now, I’m going to take some questions from the audience, so go ahead and line up in front of the microph-” Shion glanced over at the microphone, where someone was already standing. “The microphone…”

“Yes, I have a question.” Nezumi leaned forward to speak into the mic. “How did you get this way?”

“Excuse me?” Shion answered nervously as guards from the edges of the crowd began to approach Nezumi.

“It’s actually a two part question, how did you get this way, and how do you live with yourself?” The guards grabbed him but he leaned forward and planted his feet to shout into the mic. “You used to be a revolutionary, now you’re pushing for the status quo? You used to be violent, radical, and intelligent. You had bold new ideas, what happened? How did you get this way?”

“Leave him.” Shion waved security away. “You wanna know what happened to me? Nothing. Breaking down the wall was the right call. And so is Liberalism. You don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, keeping some of the economic principles behind the old No. 6 is a good idea. We may not have been perfect-”

“May not have been perfect?” Nezumi scoffed. “You were and are the antithesis of perfect. You were nothing but one large wound in the world. And after you stitched back up the wound of No. 6, you’re pulling at the threads? Come on, Shion. Even you must know deep down that it isn’t true. All of this- it’s greed. It’s a ploy for wealth, and I don’t know what happened to you that made you lose your values. You used to beg me to stay in West Block, to be the proletariat. Now you’re campaigning with Super-PACs? When will it be enough for you?”

“That’s a childish and weak argument.” Shion looked back over the crowd. “He thinks I’ve lost my morals. No, I’ve found them. I’ve evolved in my thinking since the fall, and I no longer think violent insurrection is the only way. Compassionate Capitalism, that’s-”

“What an oxymoron.”

Shion bit back the desire to scream  _ You’re an oxymoron,  _ and instead said, “True to form, Nezumi. Trying to break me down when you see I’m stronger than you. I think you’ve said enough, let’s let some real questions get through.”

After the rally, Shion collapsed into the back of his car and input the information to take him home. He curled up on the seat, struggling not to cry. “I’m not wrong,” he assured himself. “This is the right thing to do, even if I lose him. This is bigger than Nezumi and me. It’s about No. 6. It’s about setting an example for the world.” Still, tears pricked at his eyelids as he closed them, realizing what this really did mean for his future with Nezumi. “He’ll never be my friend again.”

His car pulled up in the parking lot of his apartment building, and dropped him off. He rolled out of the back seat and trudged around to the front of the building to go through the gates. He was not at all surprised to see protestors standing there waiting for him. They shouted  _ SHAME, SHAME, SHAME,  _ as he walked to the door. He  _ was  _ surprised, however, to feel a hand on his shoulder as he reached for the handle.

“Shion.” Shion spun around to face Nezumi, who was looking at him seriously. “Let me in?”

“Why should I?” Shion said tiredly.

“I want to talk to you. Face to face.”

“You’re doing so now. You did so earlier, as I recall.”

“Without the crowds. Person to person, not ideology to ideology. Reach across the aisle for me.” He looked genuine.

Shion hesitated. “Let the guards search you, and you can come in for a few minutes. I need to sleep.”

Nezumi nodded and complied as the guards patted him down and searched his backpack.

“Found a knife.” One of them said.

“Take it from him.” Shion gestured as the guard stuck the knife in his pocket. “He can have it back when he leaves.”

Nezumi twitched, but said nothing. Together, they walked inside in silence, not so much as looking at each other.

Shion locked the door to his unit behind them, and that’s when Nezumi finally spoke.

“So. Hello.”

“Hello.” Shion paused for Nezumi to say something, and when he didn’t, continued. “So, what do you want?”

“To see you as human.”

“I am.”

“Same as me?”

“Same as you.”

Nezumi nodded, folding his hands behind his back. “Okay. I guess that’s all I wanted.” He turned to leave.

“Wait.” Shion called out to stop him.

Nezumi turned around.

Shion wasn’t sure what to say next. “Have a glass of wine.”

“No thanks.”

“But…” Shion blinked, saddened. “Will I ever see you again?”

Nezumi hesitated. “I really hope not.”

“But…” Shion said again. “But, I-”

“You don’t want anything to do with me or my comrades, Shion. You don’t want to see me again.”

Shion fell silent, letting that sink in. “Are you going to try to kill me?”

Nezumi stared at him darkly. “I don’t want you dead.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“That was no good question.”

“So you are.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to.” A tingle ran up Shion’s spine. “Why are you warning me?”

“I’m not.”

“You want me to stop you?” Shion ran through the possibilities in his head. “You don’t really want to do this, so you want me to stop you?” Another question popped into Shion’s mind. “Do your comrades know you’re here?”

Nezumi was silent.

“They don’t know, am I right? You came on your own, they don’t know. They wouldn’t like it.”

“They know I’m here.”

“Oh.”

“The ones you didn’t arrest know I’m here,” Nezumi corrected bitterly.

“How many is that?”

“Can’t give away our numbers.”

“I guess one. That boy who left with you. I also guess he was the one who broke into my campaign office with you. Am I right? The pale one.”

Nezumi was silent again.

“Are you two-” Shion cut himself off.

“What?” Nezumi asked.

“Nevermind.” Shion shook his head. It was none of his business.

Nezumi stared at him with narrowed eyes, seeming to bore right into Shion’s soul. “I know who you are.”

“What?”

“I know you. I’ve always known you. I knew from the beginning you’d wind up my enemy, and here we are.” He folded his arms and took a step towards Shion. “You almost made me forget it, seven years ago. You almost made me think I was wrong.”

Shion looked into Nezumi’s eyes, noting the seriousness, the flame behind them. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“You are?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore. Because there’s a part of me that will always love you.”

“Haven’t gotten any better with words, huh?” Nezumi sniffed derisively. “You’d think after all those speeches, all those coaches-”

“I’ve always meant that,” Shion interrupted. “You just misinterpreted me. I’ll always love you. I mean that. It’s unconditional. I loved you when we were revolutionaries, and I love you now that I’m not.”

Something flickered in Nezumi’s expression. “Well, I don’t love you.”

“That’s okay.” Shion smiled. “You don’t have to. It doesn’t change how I feel.”

Nezumi seemed annoyed, which pleased Shion. “You’re ridiculous.”

“That’s a mild insult.”

“I mean it fully.”

“I think it’s okay to be a little ridiculous. It’s a ridiculous world.” Shion reached out his hand, and Nezumi backed up quickly, as if preparing for attack. “I’m shaking your hand,” Shion clarified. “Since I don’t figure you’ll let me hug you.”

Nezumi stared at Shion’s outstretched hand for a long moment. “I don’t think I can ethically do that.”

“Oh, come on.”

“I hate everything you are.”

“Nobody’s watching.” Shion looked around his room. “Except all the cameras you planted.”

“Exactly.”

“So your friend will see. Just him, right? Who cares?”

“I care. He cares.”

Shion hesitated, then dropped his hand. “Okay. Fine. Be that way.”

“I should go.” Nezumi turned toward the door.

Shion couldn’t control what he said next. “Please don’t kill me.”

Nezumi froze, and slowly turned back around.

 

******

 

“Please don’t kill me.” His words were timid, scared, as he begged for his life. It made Nezumi angry.

“Why say it like that?”

“What?”

“Fight me like a man! Stand up and fight for your life, you coward, you pacifist!” He scowled, storming over to Shion and getting in his space, shoving him. “Are you really going to let me kill you?”

“I… I didn’t say that.”

“I can hear it in your voice! You’re going to give up! What happened to your moral backbone? What happened to your sense of self-preservation?” He shoved Shion again. “Fight back!”

“I don’t want to fight you.”

“You’re in your own home, you’re within your rights! Kill me! These are fighting words, are you afraid of legal repercussions? There will be none!” He shoved Shion a third time, and he fell back onto the couch.

“I wouldn’t win.”

“It doesn’t matter, go down fighting why don’t you? What’s wrong with you?”

“I don’t want you dead. Even at the cost of my own life.”

“Then you will  _ lose  _ all you’re fighting for, because I’m not so stupid.” Nezumi scowled. “I’ll kill you easily.”

“I’m fighting for you,” Shion said. “I’m fighting for a better world  _ for you.” _

“Oh, don’t give me that shit. You’re fighting for yourself and you know it. No thinking person would be a liberal without monetary incentive.”

“I don’t-”

“Then don’t take money from super PACs,” Nezumi snapped. “Practice what you preach.”

“There are problems with socialism.”

“There are worse problems with capitalism. Should we not shed our chains because freedom brings some hardships? Should we not choose free will because the responsibility is too much to bear?”

“You’re welcome to your opinions. But don’t kill for them. You have to respect diversity of-”

“Asking for diversity of opinion is just idiots crying when their ideas are scrutinized. There is right and wrong, and you are wrong.” Nezumi folded his arms. “Goodbye for now, Shion.” He stormed out the door, slamming it behind himself. He practically ran down the stairs and out of the apartment building. He fumed through the streets to the outskirts of No. 6 where the bunker lie. He walked inside to find Jay sitting on the couch.

“That wasn’t very productive,” Jay frowned. “Thought you were going to case the place.”

“I couldn’t talk to him.” Nezumi flopped down on the couch, where Jay wrapped an arm around his shoulders, kissing him on the cheek.

“It’s okay. We’ll figure it out.” He leaned into Nezumi’s side. “Was really hoping the two of you would get it on.”

“You have a one track mind.” Nezumi leaned away as Jay tried to kiss him. “Not in the mood.”

“Okay.” Jay pulled his arm away. “What are you in the mood for?”

“Turn on his cameras.” Nezumi nodded at the remote control.

“You want to watch Shion more? You could have just stayed. He offered you a drink, you could have gotten him drunk and asked him questions.” Jay shrugged and turned on the monitor anyway.

Shion was sitting on the couch where Nezumi had shoved him, apparently not having moved. He was staring into space, head in his hands.

A slight chill ran through Nezumi’s spine seeing him like that. So vulnerable, so broken-down.

Jay seemed to notice how Nezumi was feeling. “Do you… want me to leave you alone?”

“I’m not going to fucking masturbate to Shion crying.”

“I mean… you’ve done it before.”

“Fuck off!”

“That’s not even what I meant,” Jay clarified. “Just… you seem like you might want some alone time.”

Nezumi stared at Shion for a long moment. “No. He’s not doing anything. I need a cigarette.”

“Thought you were trying to quit.”

“Not like I’m gonna survive assassinating Shion, who the fuck cares if I smoke?” Nezumi reached into Jays jacket pocket and pulled out a metal box of hand-rolled cigarettes. “Which of these are mixed with weed?”

“All of them, who do you think I am?” Jay grinned.

“Good.” Nezumi took two and stuck one in his mouth. “Lighter.”

Jay passed him a lighter and laughed as Nezumi took a long first inhale. “I fucking love you,” Jay said mirthfully. He leaned over as Nezumi gestured for him to come close, and accepted a lungful of smoke from Nezumi’s mouth. “You’re the best.”

“I know.” Nezumi glanced at the monitor, where Shion was still sat with his head in his hands. “Still can’t believe I’m gonna kill him,” Nezumi said absently around a mouthful of smoke. “I guess I’ll just blow my brains out after, right? Seems best.”

“I guess.” Jay looked uncomfortable. “I don’t wanna watch.”

“I wouldn’t ask you to. Though if I were you I’d carry around a gun for a little while after, just in case they come after you. Wouldn’t wanna get caught.” Nezumi took another long draw.

“What, you want me to shoot anyone I think is after me? How am I supposed to-” Jay caught Nezumi’s sideways glance. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Not to kill them.” Nezumi chuckled darkly. “Look, if you don’t want to risk yourself, I completely understand. But you should probably leave now and start building an alibi if that’s the case.”

Jay froze. He seemed to register what was really happening. “Give me a hit.”

“Mhm.” Nezumi passed the spliff.

Jay stared off into the distance, a deep fear in his eyes. “Guess it just now hit me that we’re really doing this.”

“We?”

“Yeah, I mean… If you’re doing it, I’m doing it.” He looked at Nezumi seriously. “I trust you. I’d follow you anywhere.”

“Oh yeah?” Nezumi’s eyelids lowered and he leaned in closer. “It’s dangerous.”

“Oh,  _ now  _ you’re in the mood.” Jay laughed. “I’m down, let’s do this.”

Nezumi scoffed, leaning away. “You sure know how to kill the vibe.”

Jay looked offended. “Wha- no! I’m into it now, let’s go.”

“You can’t just say  _ let’s go  _ and start having sex, sometimes you need a little foreplay. You have no skill with that.” Nezumi took another hit and sighed as the nicotine and THC finally started to hit him. “Play with me sometimes.”

“Well, do you still want to have sex?”

Nezumi thought about it. “No. I think I’ll say no as punishment for you killing the vibe. Next time have some subtlety.”

“Lame.” Jay huffed and slid down on the couch, opening his cigarette box and taking out a fresh one. “You’re no fun.”

“Whatever.” Nezumi took another hit. “Oh, look. Shion’s doing something.”

Shion stood and walked to his kitchen, where he pulled out a bottle of wine from his cupboard. “I know you’re still watching me.” He scanned the roof, eyes never quite coming in contact with any of the cameras. “You won’t shake my hand, you won’t drink with me… You’re going to kill me and you won’t even do me the basic respect of treating me like a person. You know why that is?”

“Why?” Nezumi asked, smiling.

“Because you’re a coward.”

“Ha.”

“You’re a coward and if you see me as a person you won’t be able to pull the trigger. Because even if you hate me, you still love me. I know it.” He unscrewed the bottle and turned it over to his mouth. “You know, I’m still a senator. I could ruin your life.”

“Ooh, I’m so scared,” Jay mocked, taking another hit. “Fucking bougie boy thinks he can control us.”

“Shh.” Nezumi leaned into the monitor, interested. “How’s he gonna ruin my life?”

“I’ll send secret service after you. I’ll have you arrested for threatening me.”

“Prove it,” Nezumi challenged.

“You have it all on tape, don’t you? Better delete your tapes.”

“Ha.”

“And I bet you’re not even a little scared of my threats, so whatever. It’s pointless.” Shion took another swig and sat back down on the couch. “Do you at least turn off the cameras when I sleep? When I shower? When I’m getting dressed in the morning? Because I know years ago you sort of implied you watched me shower, and I’m still a little disturbed by it.” He tilted back the bottle and chugged wine until he needed to breathe. “I bet you do watch me shower. I bet you’re into it.”

Nezumi’s face slowly cracked a smile. “He’s hilarious, isn’t he?”

“Don’t lie, you totally get off on him.” Jay wrapped an arm around Nezumi’s shoulders and kissed his cheek. “And I get off on you.”

“I said no.”

“You’re no fun.”

“Respect my boundaries.” Nezumi scooted away, smirking, and finished off his spliff. “Anyway, I don’t feel like watching him get drunk again. Let’s turn the monitor off.”

“Okay.” Jay grabbed the remote and turned off the monitor. “Think he’ll really come after us?”

“Election day is very soon. I don’t think he’ll do anything controversial.” Nezumi chuckled darkly. “And if he does, we just kill him sooner. I’ve got nothing left to lose.”

“I’m with you all the way,” Jay said softly.

Nezumi turned his eyes, lids lowered, to the boy. “Good.” He leaned in and kissed Jay deeply, enjoying the sensation of having someone he trusted be close to him. Best to enjoy it while they still had time. Election day was very soon.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Election day, Shion was thrumming with anxiety. His heart was in his mouth and paranoia was creeping up on him steadily. He was sitting in his campaign office with his secretary, watching but barely paying attention to the news. There was nothing to do but wait for the polls to get in, and until then he was left to his own thoughts.

He didn’t feel like thinking. He felt like being drunk and sitting on the floor of the shower under a hot stream of water until he passed out and had to crawl, soaking wet, into bed. Which is exactly what he planned to do should he lose.

There was also the added anxiety that Nezumi might try to assassinate him at any moment. He’d played over in his head a million times exactly how it might happen. Poison, maybe. Explosives, that was Nezumi’s MO. He might plant a bomb under Shion’s apartment and just blow the whole thing up. Or even good old-fashioned guns. He could also do it with his bare hands, should he be allowed to get anywhere near Shion while his bodyguards or secret service were away.

It was all so surreal, it made Shion feel a bit nauseous.

“The polls close in five minutes,” the talking head on the TV announced. “And still, it’s too close to call. Just one percentage point ahead, Shion’s gap is closing rapidly.”

Shion couldn’t breathe. One percentage point? “I need a cigarette.” He fumbled around through his desk drawer to find his seldom used and rather stale box of cigarettes and a lighter. “Who’s coming with me?”

A large bodyguard stepped forward. “Five more minutes, Senator.”

“I don’t care.” Shion stood and walked toward the door. “I just need to relax.” They walked out onto the front porch, where thankfully no protestors were gathered. They all must be too busy voting or watching the news. He lit the end shakily and took a drag. “This is bad news.”

“You think you’ll lose?” the bodyguard asked.

“I don’t know. I think it’s bad either way.” He watched the end of his cigarette burn brightly as he inhaled, letting the cooling feeling of nicotine and menthol flush his lungs.

“How so?”

Shion debated telling the bodyguard about Nezumi, and decided against it. “I just imagine the lashback.”

“They’ll get over it.” The bodyguard shrugged. “It will all be fine.”

Would it, though? Shion took another draw, and started to feel a bit better. Nothing he could do now but wait, after all. He finished off his cigarette in silence and enjoyed the buzz as the chemicals in his brain changed for the better. That was exactly what he needed.

Back inside, the results were just being announced. “And it looks like we can finally call a winner.”

Shion’s heart stopped as the newsperson paused.

“The Communist Kiwa has won.”

Shion gaped in disbelief. He lost?

Just then, all the lights shut off in the building, and the TV switched off with a quiet click. With a clatter of feet, all the security officers surrounded Shion and drew their guns, lighting up the darkness with flashlights.

Suddenly, with a screech of feedback, speakers in the ceiling sprung to life.

“Your building is surrounded. All the exits are covered. There are several bombs placed in the foundation of this building, set to go off any minute. Surrender Shion or we detonate.” Nezumi’s voice was distorted, but Shion recognized it instantly.

“You won!” Shion cried out. “Kiwa won!”

“Surrender Shion or all of you will die. You have three minutes.” The speakers died.

Shion’s secretary was crying.

“We don’t yet know if this is a credible threat,” one of the guards said.

“It is.” Shion said sadly, taking out another cigarette and lighting it. “I know who this is.”

“Who?”

“If I say, he’ll blow us up.” Shion took a long draw and closed his eyes. “Alright. Surrender me.”

“Not happening.” One of the guards cocked his gun. “We’ll get you out of this, Senator. We’ll-”

“No,” Shion said firmly. “This is an order. Surrender me, then call a bomb squad. Just get yourselves home safely.”

There was silence for a long moment before Shion announced to the speakers, “Alright. Where do you want me to go?”

It was another painfully long moment before the speakers crackled back to life. Shion almost thought Nezumi had left. “Out the front door. Get in the truck.”

“You got it.” Shion took a deep inhale on his cigarette before extinguishing it under his shoe on the floor. He pushed past his bodyguards and walked out the front door, where a truck was indeed waiting. Two men with guns in masks approached him, silently tied a blindfold over his eyes, and handcuffed him before leading him into the truck.

“Just kill me here,” Shion snapped, annoyed. “Don’t drag me around town, just get it over with.”

“We’re not killing you yet, Shion.” Nezumi said. “You lost, remember? You saw the news.”

Shion turned his head towards the source of the voice. “Yeah, I lost. So what’s the point in kidnapping me?”

“We’ll tell you everything you want to know later.” Nezumi put a hand on his shoulder. “Just relax.”

_ “Relax?!”  _ Shion screamed hysterically. “I’m being kidnapped at gunpoint!”

Nezumi paused for a moment. “Okay, so have another cigarette. Your health doesn’t matter anymore, right?”

“You could give me hard drugs and I wouldn’t relax.” Shion pulled on his handcuffs. “These hurt.”

“Well…” Nezumi conferred in muffled voices with his partners. Shion couldn’t make out what they were saying. “Do you want some?”

“Some what?”

“Hard drugs.”

Shion barked a laugh. “Yeah, sure.”

An unfamiliar voice spoke up. “He’ll probably be easier to deal with if he’s sedated.”

That’s when Shion realized they were being serious. “Wait, I didn’t mean-”

“Yeah, no shit. He’s actually a lot tougher than he looks, we could just make it easy on ourselves.”

“Do you have anything?”

“Who do I look like? Of course.”

“Well, give it to him.”

“I’m not cooking up in the truck, give me my backpack I have pills.”

“Wait!” Shion said.

“Sorry, Shion.” Nezumi patted him on the back. “Shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“But I don’t want drugs, you can’t make me.”

“Sure we can,” another voice spoke up. How many people were in this truck?

“I won’t open my mouth.” Shion shut his mouth as the people in the truck laughed. After a short scuffle, someone pinched his nose. Instinctively. Shion opened his mouth to breathe, and someone shoved a bitter pill inside, covering his mouth so he wouldn’t spit it out.

“Get me some water,” Nezumi ordered. A moment later, someone was tipping water into Shion’s mouth. He almost choked. He would have choked if he didn’t swallow, and that meant swallowing the pill.

Frustrated, Shion wrenched on his chains, bruising his wrists.

“Careful,” Nezumi warned. “You’re not escaping, so you’re just hurting yourself.”

He was right. With a sigh of defeat, Shion slouched into Nezumi’s side.

“Aww… Haha,” a voice said mirthfully.

“Shut up, Jay.”

“Ey- don’t use my name.”

“Whatever, it’s a fake name.”

“Still, though.” Jay huffed. “Opsec, you know?”

“Don’t tell me about opsec, I know about opsec,” Nezumi argued.

“Cool. But sometimes we all need reminders,” Jay said flatly.

“It’s Shion, who’s he gonna tell your code name to anyway?” Nezumi sounded annoyed, and Shion leaned away.

“Okay, sure, but just for your general knowledge-”

“Fucking bite me, Jay.”

Jay huffed. “Again, you’re using my name, and I’d prefer you didn’t.”

“What are you gonna do about it?”

“Uh oh,” someone else laughed.

“Maybe I will bite you.” Jay’s voice sounded different suddenly. Almost-

“Dare you to try.”

The argument stopped, replaced by the very distinctive sound of people kissing.

“Hey!” a gruff voice called out. “Not in my fucking truck!”

Shion’s face must have looked as red as it felt, because everyone started laughing at him.

“Look! He’s so embarrassed. That’s cute as hell.”

“Guess he’s not used to people like Jay and Nezumi.”

“Or he’s a straightie and freaked out by queers. Some of them are like that.”

“Shion’s not straight,” Nezumi said with a scoff.

Shion felt the need to defend himself. “I never said I wasn’t straight!”

There was a moment of silence, then Nezumi and Jay burst out laughing.

“What?” Shion frowned, annoyed.

“You literally said you loved me.” Nezumi countered.

“I do!”

“So you’re clearly queer,” Nezumi reasoned.

“Don’t use that word.”

There was another pause before the entire car laughed at him.

“Why the hell not?” Nezumi gasped, hysterical. “What the hell kind of internalized shit do you have that you can handle confessing your love for a guy but can’t handle being called queer?”

“Because I’m not!” Shion wanted to cry. “I’m just… I just… Can we talk about this later?”

“Later when the drugs kick in?” Nezumi chuckled. “Sure.”

“No!” Shion’s blood ran cold. “I mean, I just mean that I’m…” He sighed. “I do love you. And I feel like our bond goes deeper than the bonds I’ve ever had with anyone else, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m gay, you know? I think about you and I just feel… comfortable. Like I want to be close to you.”

Jay whistled lowly. “Oh, honey.”

“Shion,” Nezumi still sounded like he was trying not to laugh. “First of all, we’re teasing you so relax. Second of all, that’s hands down the gayest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“No!” Shion huffed. “Maybe I’m not making myself clear.”

“You kissed me, you weirdo. How is that not clear?”

Shion wanted to die of embarrassment. “But like I said, I want to be close to you. And… and maybe that involves… intimacy of some kind, but-”

The people in the car were howling.

_ “Intimacy,  _ he says!” Jay clapped Shion on the shoulder. “I see why Nezumi likes you.”

Shion shut up and tried to let it go. Nezumi was right. They were teasing him. And fighting back was going to get him nowhere. Moments later, however, he felt very relaxed. For whatever reason, he couldn’t fathom it, but he was suddenly not at all worried about what was happening to him. He sighed as his brain calmed down.

“Oh fuck, he’s actually kind of hot like that.” Jay reached over and adjusted Shion’s hair. “All drugged up and kidnapped with handcuffs on. Nez, can we-”

“No we cannot,” Nezumi interrupted firmly.

“But-”

“For every reason,” Nezumi interrupted again.

“Oh right, I’m on drugs. I’m high on drugs,” Shion marvelled. “Wow.”

Jay groaned. “But he’s so-”

“Exactly.” Nezumi put a protective arm around Shion’s shoulders and Shion felt safe. “Drop it.”

“What did I take, exactly?” Shion asked, leaning heavily into Nezumi’s side and curling up. “I think I like it.”

“Heroin. Of course you like it.”

“Oh.” That should have been enough to scare Shion senseless, but it didn’t. “My brain feels tingly.”

Jay sucked air through his teeth. “Fuck. Nezumi, he’s-”

“I know.”

“Really fucking sexy.”

“You need to calm down.” Nezumi’s tone was serious. “We’re not doing anything to him. Especially not right now.”

The car rocked to a stop, and that’s when they took off Shion’s blindfold.

 

******

 

Nezumi removed Shion’s blindfold, and Shion blinked in the sudden dim light of the garage they were parked in. Everyone took off the masks they were wearing.

“Welcome to the bunker.” Nezumi helped him wobble out of the car. The pill they’d given him was pretty strong, he’d probably be a bit out of it for a while.

“Where are we?”

“What do you think the point of the blindfold was?” Nezumi said as he unlocked the handcuffs. “I can’t tell you where we are.”

Hands freed, Shion stumbled forward into Nezumi’s arms. “Why did you kidnap me?” he slurred, head on Nezumi’s shoulder.

“I’ll tell you when you come down.”

“Come down from where?” Shion sounded confused.

“Your high.”

That seemed to take a minute to register in Shion’s brain. “Oh! That’s funny.”

“Is it?” Nezumi half-smiled. “I think you’re just very high. Come on, let’s go sit down. Get you some water.” He walked him indoors and sat him down, snatching a water bottle off the floor.

“Thank you for taking care of me.” Shion looked up at him emotionally. “That’s very nice of you.”

“Remember the circumstances,” Nezumi reminded, sitting down on the couch next to him.. “I kidnapped and drugged you first. Don’t thank me.”

“Right.” Shion nodded dutifully. “You’re a bad guy.” He grinned. “Did you ever play cops and robbers as a kid?”

“Didn’t really have that kind of childhood.”

“I  _ always  _ wanted to be the cop, and I always thought it was fun to be caught and put in jail by the robbers. The jail was the jungle gym.”

“Cool.” Nezumi frowned. “You feeling okay?”

“Great!” Shion’s face was plastered with a druggie’s smile. “I think that’s how fetishes start.”

Nezumi almost laughed. “What now?”

“As kids. Fetishes start when you’re a kid. You get a tingly feeling in your body, and you don’t know what it means, but you know you like it. Then it turns sexual when you’re older. You know? Did you ever have that?”

“I… no, I don’t think so. You’re saying you had fetishes as a kid?” Nezumi was amazed at the way this conversation was going.

“Yeah. Like… fetish for being caught by the bad guy.” Shion looked at him earnestly.

“So…” Nezumi wanted to make sure he was understanding this properly. “So, right now, this right here- this is actually a fantasy of yours? One you’ve had since you were a kid? Is that what you’re saying?”

Shion stared at him dully for a long moment before his face flushed red and he gasped. “Oh my god, I  _ did _ just say that out loud.”

Nezumi snorted. “And you still think you’re not gay?”

Shion buried his face in his hands and said nothing.

“It’s okay, you’re on drugs. We all get a little overly truthful on drugs.” Nezumi patted his shoulder. “Drink some water.”

Shion avoided eye contact as he opened his water bottle and took a drink. “So why did you kidnap me?” he asked. “Since I lost.”

Jay strode into the room, wearing nothing but his underwear. “Should we just tell him?”

“Put some clothes on.” Nezumi commanded.

“I’m in my own damn house,” Jay frowned.

“We have a guest.”

“Excuse you, we have a  _ victim.” _ Jay ran his fingers through his hair so it stood on end. “And I’m definitely going to convince him to have sex with me before this is all over, so no. I will not put some clothes on.” Jay stuck his hip out and look Shion up and down. “So anyway, we should tell him.”

“Tell me what?” Shion asked, clearly having already forgotten his own question.

“Tell you why we kidnapped you, sweetheart.” Jay smiled kindly at Shion. “If you really want to know. We owe that to you.”

“Oh, yeah.” Shion nodded. “I want to know.”

“Jay,” Nezumi warned.

“He deserves to know what’s going to happen to him, Nez.”

Nezumi twitched. “You know, Nezumi is already a nickname. You don’t have to shorten it.”

“So  _ anyway,”  _ Jay continued, looking at Shion. “Kiwa’s being kidnapped as we speak. By  _ your  _ people.”

“My people? But-”

“Not his people, Jay. Fash,” Nezumi corrected quickly.

“Fash?” Shion asked.

“Fascists,” Jay clarified. “We think ancaps. Anarcho-capitalists. Libertarians.”

“They kidnapped Kiwa?” Shion asked, looking surprised. “Why?”

“Probably to kill her. We were going to do the same thing to you if you won. But you didn’t.” Jay strode over and sat next to Nezumi. “So we had to kidnap you so that we have a bargaining chip for Kiwa. It seems like they had the same plan. We both decided to kidnap the opposition candidate and kill the winner or bargain with the loser. Make sense?”

“Yeah.” Shion nodded dully. “But why do fascists want me as their leader?”

Jay laughed for a second before seeming to realize Shion was serious. “Oh, so you don’t know anything?”

“Told you, he’s clueless,” Nezumi grumbled. “This is why I didn’t want to tell him anything.”

“They’re capitalists. Their whole goal is to collect as much capital as possible before the crash so they can ride out the wave in relative comfort.” Jay shook his head at Shion. “So they want you because you’ll allow them to do that. They can oppress and exploit whoever they want under your law.

“But-”

“That’s how it works, Shion,” Nezumi interjected. “That’s why we have to end this now.”

“So…” Shion’s voice go small. “If they kill her, you kill me?”

“That’s right,” Jay said bluntly.

“And…” Shion looked like he was thinking hard. “If they don’t kill her? You’ll let me go?”

Jay and Nezumi looked at each other seriously, which seemed to make Shion uncomfortable.

“So, I die either way?”

“We can’t appear soft, Nez,” Jay said.

“If we kill him they kill Kiwa,” Nezumi reminded.

“He’s seen our faces.”

“That’s not a problem if we follow through,” Nezumi said darkly. “We can go on the run, we can kill ourselves, we can do a lot to avoid prison. We don’t have to kill Shion if they don’t kill Kiwa.”

“I mean, maybe.” Jay sighed. “We’ll see. They’ll probably kill Kiwa anyway, so the point is moot.”

Shion looked very pale. “I feel sick.”

“Probably, we gave you a lot of H.” Jay reached over to pat Shion’s back.

“Where’s your bathroom?” Shion asked anxiously.

“Come with me, baby.” Jay tutted, helping Shion up and guiding him in the direction of the bathroom. “Sorry everything’s so messy. Leftists are not tidy people.”

Nezumi pushed himself off the couch to hover in the doorway of the bathroom as Shion dropped to his knees, shaking violently, in front of the toilet. “It comes down to us or him, I think.” He nodded at Shion. “Either he dies or we do. We kill him here, or we let him go and kill ourselves. Right?”

“Right.” Jay sighed deeply. “I’m afraid that’s how it’s going to go. Messy ending either way.”

Shion lurched and vomited, almost collapsing as his arms shook supporting himself. “Please don’t kill me,” he gasped, voice hoarse.

“Don’t do that,” Nezumi snapped, annoyed. “It doesn’t help to beg for your life, it only makes you look undignified.”

Shion choked as he vomited again. “I have no fucking dignity here.”

“Clearly not.”

“What’s happening to me?” His entire body was shaking like a leaf, and he was sweating profusely. “Am I dying? Why do I still feel really good?”

Nezumi shrugged. “It’s heroin. It feels good when it fucks you up.”

“Can you just leave me alone for a minute?” Shion sobbed, still trembling.

“No, you might kill yourself. Then we’re fucked.” Nezumi leaned against the doorframe.

“This is really dark, guys.” Shion sat back away from the toilet. “I don’t know if I can handle this.”

“You don’t have to handle anything, we’ve got this.” Jay handed Shion a glass of water from the sink. “You’re just gonna stay with us for a few days until we see how things play out, alright? In the meantime, get to know us. I think you’ll find we’re not all bad people.”

Shion took a tentative sip of the water, looking suspicious. “Not all bad people…”

“Why don’t you take a shower, Shion? Then we can get an early night’s sleep.” Jay helped him to stand, and gestured towards the shower. “Would you prefer me or Nezumi to be with you?”

Shion glared at Nezumi. “You. Nezumi can leave.”

Jay smiled. “Okay, no problem. See you in a bit, Nez.”

Nezumi glared back at Shion. “Yeah.”

“Go to sleep, babe.” Jay instructed him.

Nezumi nodded, still glaring at Shion. “I’m tired anyway.” He shoved off the door and spun around to storm out of the bathroom. It was going to be a long night.


	5. Chapter 5

Shion woke up feeling like he was in his own bed. For a beautiful moment, he thought it had only been a nightmare. A really horrible fever dream that he now got to wake up from.

Alas, when he opened his eyes the world came crashing back around him. He was in the bunker, and Nezumi and Jay were sleeping on either side of him.

Jay stretched and woke up a moment after Shion did. He blinked and looked at Shion almost with surprise. “Mornin’, beautiful.” He reached out and touched the scar on Shion’s cheek. “How do you feel?”

Shion shrugged. “Better. A little out of it. A little nauseous.”

Jay’s eyes opened wide and he gasped. “Wake and bake.”

Nezumi seemed to stir to those words. “What now? What are we doing?” He pushed himself groggily up. “Oh. Shion.”

“Morning.” Shion watched as Nezumi stretched and cracked his spine. “So… you guys do drugs in the morning?”

“We’re ancoms,” Jay explained. “We do drugs all the time.” He sighed, staring deeply into Shion’s eyes. “You’re so pretty.”

“Th-thank you?” Shion sat up, uncomfortable. “Do we not have anything to do today?” he asked.

“Nope.” Jay sat up too, scooting closer to Shion. “Just watch the news and see what happens.”

“Oh.” That’s when Shion remembered what he was here for. “Right.”

“Hey, don’t think about it.” Jay reached over to the nightstand and grabbed a glass pipe. “Don’t think about anything.” He waved at Nezumi, who apparently took that as his cue to find the weed. They packed a bowl and offered it first to Shion.

“What do I do?” Shion asked, inspecting the pipe.

Jay practically squealed. “I just want to eat you up, you’re so cute. I’ll do it, just inhale.” He placed his fingers around the bowl and lit a lighter next to it. Shion inhaled, and the flame was sucked downward towards the green. Jay carefully burned just the edge, and pulled the bowl away so Shion could exhale. He coughed, and Jay rubbed his back. “So sweet. I love him. I love him, Nezumi. He’s like a stuffed animal.”

Shion didn’t entirely appreciate being addressed as such, but he wasn’t in any mood to argue. “So we’re just going to get high and watch the news of my kidnapping?”

“Trippy, right?” Jay nodded. “We’re also going to have sex, so you can close your eyes if you’re not into it.”

“In front of me?” Shion squeaked.

“We don’t have another choice.” Nezumi took the bowl. “We have to watch you 24/7.”

“You could pass me off to someone else. Or just not have sex.”

Nezumi and Jay glanced at each other. “Nah…” they said in unison.

“We can’t pass you off to anyone else, they’re all busy,” Nezumi said.

“And we’re getting stoned so we’re definitely having sex. You’re welcome to join in,” Jay added.

“Just… just chain me to a radiator out in the main room,” Shion protested. “I won’t escape.”

“Why are you so against this?” Jay asked curiously.

“He’s terrified of sex,” Nezumi rolled his eyes.

“I am not!” Shion exclaimed, offended.

“You just said you’d rather be chained to a radiator than watch people have sex.” Nezumi reminded him.

Shion thought about it for a long moment before he gave up. “I guess it’s just sex. I’ll just try not to pay attention. Turn on the news.”

Jay reached for the remote and flipped on the news which was showing Shion’s and Kiwa’s faces side by side, with a large banner that read “Kidnapped” below them.

Shion stared at the muted TV, something churning in his gut. “Give me another hit.”

“You got it.” Jay helped him out with the pipe again, showing Shion how to do it himself. “Perfect,” he said as Shion exhaled a huge cloud of smoke.

Suddenly, a wave of disclarity hit his head, it crawled down into his shoes and rooted him to where he sat on the bed, a stupefied look on his face.

“Here you go, baby.” Jay held the pipe back up to Shion’s lips for him and lit it while Shion inhaled, not thinking about it. “Just be with it.”

Shion zoned out, letting his mind spiral off in a thousand crazy directions. Here he was, sitting in a bed with Nezumi and his boyfriend, and wasn’t that  _ interesting?  _ How much his life had changed since he was sixteen. How much his life had evolved. Or devolved. After all, he was doing drugs in a communist bunker with his two soon-to-be murderers, one of whom he loved dearly. What a strange and interesting situation.

He felt a hand on his back and instantly recognized it to be Nezumi’s. He was rubbing up and down, petting Shion over his shirt. Strange, but Shion didn’t have the presence of mind to think about it. He was in a stupor. Puffs of weed smoke were floating around his head, making the room foggy. He wanted to fall back asleep, he felt so relaxed.

The bed shifted, and suddenly there were two hands on him, touching his hair and clothes. Blinking tiredly, Shion looked back to see what was happening.

Nezumi and Jay’s mouths were locked together, their legs intertwined as they sat on each other’s laps, looking disheveled.

“Wha- stop it.” Shion stood up off the bed so they couldn’t touch him. “Don’t drag me into your weird sex games.”

They pulled apart with a dazed look.

“Don’t you think we’re sexy?” Jay asked, pouting.

“No,” Shion replied automatically.

“You don’t want to die a virgin, do you, Shion?” Nezumi asked.

“No, but I-”

“So we’re your last chance,” Nezumi put it bluntly. “Die a virgin or have sex with the enemy… I know what I’d pick.”

The darkness of the realization that he was indeed going to die hit Shion in his very core. His thoughts spiralled, leading him deeper and deeper down the well of despair without ever finding the bottom. He felt like Alice toppling into wonderland. Only ever falling faster. He was going to die, and these two were going to kill him. They were going to take a gun, place it to his temple, and pull the trigger, blowing out his mind, his thoughts, his personality onto the walls and floor. How nauseating. He sat back down on the bed, feeling almost as sick as he had felt the previous night.

Jay wrapped him up in a hug from behind. “I’m not going to tell you everything’s going to be okay, because it’s not. But I will invite you one more time to indulge your last hedonistic impulses with us if you so choose.”

“How are you going to kill me?” Shion asked, not bothering to shove Jay away.

“With a gun,” Nezumi said.

“Show me.” Shion blinked, trying not to cry. “Show me the gun.”

Nezumi and Jay looked at each other suspiciously.

“We’ll… we’ll have to tie your hands first,” Jay said hesitantly. “You know, for safety.”

“Do it.” Shion held out his hands. “I need to see.”

Looking unsure, Nezumi found the pair of handcuffs and chained Shion to the headboard. “You sure about this?”

“Show me the gun,” Shion insisted.

Jay left the room and came back a moment later with a black, metal handgun. It was thick, and looked heavy.

“Is it loaded?” Shion asked breathlessly, realizing he was looking at his own murder weapon.

“Yeah.” Jay nodded. “We always keep it loaded.”

“Bring it closer.” Shion’s hands were tied, but he gazed open mouthed as Jay crawled up on the bed with the loaded gun in his hand. “Which bullet?” Shion asked.

“Huh?” Jay looked at Nezumi, who shrugged.

“Which bullet will kill me?” Shion clarified.

“Probably the next one,” Jay said, and popped it out of the chamber. “This one.”

“Let me hold it,” Shion requested, pulling on his chains. “Please.”

Jay pressed the cool, silver bullet into Shion’s restrained palm. It was heavy. Shion had expected it to feel hollow, but it was heavy. A lump of metal that would soon blast through his skull.

“Satisfied?” Nezumi asked skeptically.

Shion clung to the piece of metal, biting back the shakes. This thing, this very thing- it was going to kill him. Soon. Maybe today. It would be fired out of the barrel of that black metal handgun and shoot through his temple into his brain. That was surreal.

“Where are you going to shoot me?” Shion asked.

“Probably outside in the woods, far away from the bunker.” Jay looked at Nezumi to confirm. He nodded.

“Less messy that way.”

“No, no. Where in my body?”

“Your head.” Nezumi looked at Shion like he was an idiot. “We’re not monsters. We won’t make you suffer.”

“Point to exactly where.” Shion leaned forward.

A dark look came over Nezumi’s face and he swallowed roughly. “Where do you want it?”

Shion thought about it. “It will probably damage my skull less if you do it through my temple. I want my mom to be able to look at my body and recognize me.”

“You’re very recognizable,” Nezumi reminded.

“Yes, but…” Maybe this was irrational, but… “I just want her to be able to see my face. One last time. So please, try not to damage me too much.”

Nezumi nodded, and broke eye contact. “I can do that.”

“Nezumi, will you be the one to shoot me?” Shion asked, squeezing the bullet in his palm.

“Yes.” Nezumi whispered. “It’s been decided.”

“Then put the gun to my head.” Shion nodded to the bullet in his hand, which Nezumi took back.

“What, now?” Nezumi asked, popping the bullet back inside the chamber.

“Yes.” Shion shifted so he was comfortable. “Put the gun to my head right where you’re going to shoot me.”

Nezumi took a deep breath, and crawled over so he was sitting directly in front of Shion. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Shion shut his eyes tight as Nezumi moved to press the gun into Shion’s left temple. A shudder ran through his body at the sensation. “Stay there,” he commanded. “I want to feel it.” It felt cold and hard and sinister. Like a snake. Like a lion. Like a wasp. Shion breathed deeply in and out, allowing himself to memorize the sensation of the gun on his head, the feeling of Nezumi’s proximity, his body heat along with the cold, cold metal of the gun. “Leave the gun there and kiss me,” Shion breathed, overwhelmed by sensation. He couldn’t open his eyes, that would be too much.

No, too much was the feeling of Nezumi’s soft lips against his own, the feeling of love and hatred mixed into one passionate emotion. Deep fear colored everything, and Shion’s guts quivered in confusion about everything that was going on.

Pushing through the terror, Shion parted his lips and kissed Nezumi deeper. Gun still pressed to his temple, he squirmed so their bodies were closer together and ran his tongue along the bottom of Nezumi’s lip.

Nezumi pulled away, eyes shining brightly with equal confusion to Shion. “Are you okay?”

“Clearly fucking not,” Shion snapped. “But I’m inexplicably aroused at the moment, and I think I’d like you to do something about it.”

Nezumi nodded hesitantly. “Whatever you want.”

“Should we take your clothes off?” Jay asked hesitantly, looking a little uncertain.

“Yes.” Shion squirmed.

“We’ll have to uncuff you, so we’ll have to put the gun away.” Nezumi handed Jay the gun, and Jay backed away slowly.

“Recuff me and bring it back when we’re done undressing,” Shion ordered as he quickly stripped down to nothing.

“Oh...kay.” Nezumi looked highly disconcerted.

“And give me another hit off the pipe.” If he was going to die, he was going to do whatever the fuck he felt like doing.

Nezumi handed him the pipe and Shion used it like he’d seen Jay using it. His lungs filled with hot smoke, a very different sensation from tobacco smoke. He held it in as Nezumi undressed him and exhaled once he was naked.

“Handcuff me,” Shion commanded, moving his wrists into position.

“Whatever you want,” Nezumi repeated quietly, eyes flicking over Shion’s naked body.

“Bring the gun back.” Shion looked at Jay seriously.

Jay walked forward slowly, gun in his hands.

“Come here,” Shion instructed him.

Jay crawled over onto the bed and gazed at Shion through cloudy eyes. It was clear he was turned on by this too. “Open your mouth and stick out your tongue,” Jay commanded.

Shion did as he was told.

Without warning, Jay shoved the barrel of the gun into Shion’s mouth as far as it would go, making him gag and struggle. The shock of this went straight to Shion’s gut, and every muscle in his body tightened. He fought back the urge to gag again as Jay twisted the gun in his mouth, clashing against his teeth and straining his jaw.

“Jay…” Nezumi warned.

“Let me have fun with him, he clearly wants it.” Jay’s eyes were glazed.

“Be careful.” Nezumi sat down next to him, grabbing the arm that held the gun. “This is a real gun.”

“Who cares if he dies?” Jay murmured, causing Shion to let out a squeak. “He’s gonna die anyway.” He ran his hand down Shion’s stomach to his groin and massaged there.

Confusion ate away at Shion’s senses. He felt good, but absolutely terrified. It burned away his vision, leaving him blinded to all but the sensation of the gun in his mouth slowly pushing backwards into his throat, and the feeling of Jay’s hand getting him hard with skillful ease.

“You’re gonna fucking die,” Jay whispered into his ear. “Bang splat, little bougie boy. Fucking capitalist scum.” Jay was stroking Shion up and down, cheeks flushed red.

Shion made a small noise of fear, which was muffled and distorted by the gun in his mouth.

“Jay, we don’t have to torture him,” Nezumi whispered nervously, looking at Shion with wide eyes.

“That’s exactly what I want to do,” Jay hissed. “I hate him. It’s not fair he gets to die painlessly.”

Shion tried to protest, but his words were suppressed by the gun.

Jay shoved the gun down further, seemingly as punishment for speaking. “You don’t get to tell me what to do,” he snapped at Shion, fire in his eyes.

“Jay, let him talk.” Nezumi tried to ease the gun from Jay’s hand. “You’re going a little overboard.”

“No. If he talks, I’m going to beat the crap out of him.”

Shion shrunk.

“Jay!” Nezumi said firmly. “Stop it.”

Jay ground his hips down onto Shion’s groin, groaning. “But  _ Nezumi,  _ look how sexy he is scared?”

Nezumi looked at Shion, a dull expression on his face. “You can’t kill him. We need him.”

“Then let me beat him up a little. I know how not to kill people.” Jay begged, still holding the gun to Shion’s mouth.

Nezumi looked at the news, which was still showing photographs of Shion and Kiwa.

Shion prayed silently that Nezumi would continue to defend him. This had crossed a line, and Shion wasn’t comfortable anymore, regardless of how much he was getting turned on by Jay’s touches.

“If you must.”

Before Shion could even process what Nezumi had said, white light erupted behind his eyes and pain blossomed in his cheek. He fell to the side and the gun was wrenched from his mouth as his arms twisted behind him, still bound to the bed. There was a sudden pressure over his entire body as Jay lay on top of him, pulling their groins together and grinding down ruthlessly.

“Nnngh, fuck.” Jay said as he massaged his knuckles. “So sexy.”

Something about the pain sent arousal pooling between Shion’s legs. He gasped for air as Jay dry humped him, looking blindly around himself to see where Nezumi had gone.

“Nezumi?” Shion asked, tasting blood in his mouth. He screamed as his arm was wrenched to the side, twisted at the elbow and cuffs eating into his wrist.

“You don’t get to talk,” Jay commanded, holding Shion by the now sprained elbow. “I wanna watch you two fuck.”

Nezumi was still standing to the side, fully clothed. “Shion, do you want this?”

“Who cares?” Jay cried hysterically.

“I fucking care,” Nezumi shot back. “Shion, are you okay?”

Shion shook his head, pain sending shockwaves boring into his skull. “Help.”

“Uncuff him,” Nezumi commanded. “And give me the gun.”

Jay looked at Nezumi in shock. “You just said I could beat him up.”

“Yes, beat him up. Not rape him.”

“You have weird standards.”

“Better than having  _ no  _ standards.” Nezumi folded his arms. “Now give me the gun.”

Jay sighed, but handed over the gun. Nezumi strode out of the room to put it away.

While he was gone, Jay continued massaging Shion’s cock with devilish skill. “I know you really want this,” he whispered. “I’ll take good care of you, baby.” He kissed along Shion’s jaw, curling up into his side to lick a stripe down his neck. “You’re so beautiful yet so evil.”

The pain and the humiliation only served to build Shion’s arousal. He whimpered pathetically as Nezumi came back in.

 

******

 

“I said uncuff him, Jay!” Nezumi said as he came back in the room to find Jay lying in bed with Shion, touching him. Shion’s cock was erect and weeping, and Jay seemed to take this as consent.

“He’s into it,” Jay said, increasing the speed at which he pumped Shion’s cock.

Nezumi growled and stormed forward to get the handcuff keys off the nearby table and uncuff Shion. “You can’t do stuff like this.”

“What, you think he wants me to stop?” Jay let go of Shion’s cock, which sprung up to touch his stomach. Shion groaned. “See?” Jay said defiantly. “He’s into it.”

Nezumi sat down on the bed next to Shion and inspected him carefully. “He’s high. He doesn’t know what he wants.” He carefully lifted Shion’s elbow, which was swelling fast.

Shion gasped in pain and Nezumi gingerly lowered the elbow back to the bed.

“You sprained his arm.” Nezumi said, annoyed.

“You said I could beat him up!” Jay reminded.

“Yeah, but…” Nezumi had thought he’d be okay with seeing Shion hurt. He’d thought he’d wanted it. Now actually seeing the bruising on Shion’s cheek, the swelling on his elbow… he felt a little sick. “Leave me alone with him for a minute.”

“But-”

“I’m the one who’s gotta kill him, Jay!” Nezumi’s voice almost broke, but he controlled it. Still, he sounded a bit hysterical. “Give me a fucking second with him!”

Jay paled, and stood. “Okay,” he said softly. “Okay.” He left the room.

“Shion, I…” Nezumi wasn’t sure what to say. Tears were running down Shion’s bruised cheeks. “I…”

“I’m not gonna say it’s okay,” Shion muttered, looking away. “But I do still love you.”

Emotion hit Nezumi’s heart hard, and he bit back tears. “Why?  _ Why?” _

“I don’t know. But I do want to be with you, that I’m certain of. Before I die.”

Nezumi’s eyes widened. “I don’t know if I can-”

“Try. For me.” Shion looked up at him with bright, shining eyes. “Kiss me, please.”

That’s when Nezumi realized he was looking into the eyes of a dead man. Shion knew he was a goner, and he’d accepted his fate. So who was Nezumi to deny him one last moment of Earthly pleasure? No matter how ill it made him feel.

He leaned in and kissed Shion firmly. The two embraced carefully, keeping Shion’s injured arm still.

“Touch me,” Shion whispered, using his good arm to move Nezumi’s hand to his cock.

The world was spinning. Nezumi stroked Shion slowly, building up speed. He gazed into Shion’s eyes, watching every spark of arousal, every emotion, every thought pass through them. He wanted to give him the world before he died, he wanted to spend a lifetime in the next couple days. He leaned his head down between Shion’s thighs and took him into his mouth.

Shion moaned. “Oh god…”

Nezumi swallowed around the head, using his tongue to swirl circles around the shaft. He tried not to think about it too much, just get on with what he was doing like he’d done as a teenager when he’d done this sort of thing to survive. He spread Shion’s legs and took him to the hilt, relaxing his gag reflex and humming softly. It only took a second before Shion was coming down the back of Nezumi’s throat, moaning in what sounded like both pain and pleasure.

Nezumi pulled away. “Are you okay?”

“No.” Shion was panting. “I’m really not. I’m really fucked up right now. In several ways.”

Nezumi’s eyes burned with the effort it took not to break down and cry. “I’m sorry it has to be this way.”

“But it does have to be this way. I understand.” Shion nodded, not even trying not to cry as tears rolled down his cheeks. “One of us is gonna die. It’s you or me. Probably me.”

Nezumi had to hope. He had to hope it was Shion who was going to die, because wishing for his own death wasn’t something he could psychologically manage. But Shion was right. One of them was definitely going to die. Either him and Jay, or Shion. Utilitarian ethics said it should be better that Shion died. Right? It was the trolley problem. So why did it make Nezumi feel so sick?

He laid down in bed next to Shion as the room spun and morphed around him. He’d killed people before. He’d shot people many times. Why did Shion have to be different? Why did the very thought of killing Shion make him want to gag in disgust with himself? The sheer shame was making him dizzy.

“Can I come back in?” Jay called through the door.

Nezumi looked at Shion, who paled, but nodded.

“Come in,” Nezumi called back.

“Can I still have sex with him?” Jay asked as he opened the door and leaned against the frame.

“No, I think that’s a very bad idea.” Nezumi sat up gingerly, pressing a hand to his forehead to stop the spins.

Jay huffed. “Can I have sex with you?”

Nezumi didn’t want to say no. That would make him seem weak, wouldn’t it? It would make him seem like the whole murder thing was getting to him. Which it was, but Jay didn’t need to know that. He was cornered. “Sure.”

Shion gave no further protest from where he lay on his side of the bed, choking on pain and spun out by drugs and sex. He just stared at the ceiling with his eyebrows drawn together, clutching his elbow.

Jay leapt onto the bed and practically attacked Nezumi, knocking him over onto his back and running his hands and mouth all over Nezumi’s body as he undressed the both of them.

“Can I fuck you?” Jay asked, stroking himself firmly with a crazed look in his eyes. “In front of him?”

The idea of showing submission in front of Shion was humiliating, but again, Nezumi wasn’t sure how to say no. He couldn’t pretend like he’d never let Jay do that before, and he couldn’t pretend like this whole situation was anything but normal. He bit back his shame and nodded.

Jay growled with delight and snatched the lotion from the bedside table. “God if I get any harder my dick will turn into a diamond.”

“Do you get off on torture, Jay?” Nezumi asked dully.

“Yes, but you haven’t seen me torture, Nezumi.” Jay laughed. “We’ll have to do that before we kill him or ourselves.” He glanced over at Shion. “Wanna see me torture him?” he breathed.

Shion didn’t say anything. He just laid there, looking to be in pain already.

“No.” Nezumi said firmly.

Jay ignored him and moved over to Shion, who still didn’t react. “Let me just hurt him a little bit. I wanna see him cry. I bet he’s fucking beautiful when he cries.” He slid his hand over to Shion’s throat. Shion still didn’t move. “You’re so sweet and kind and  _ evil,  _ Shion,” Jay whispered. “I wanna hurt you and then make you feel all better.” He squeezed lightly with both hands, causing Shion to finally twitch.

“Jay…” Nezumi warned. “You don’t have to do this. We were gonna have sex, remember?”

“Oh we will,” Jay nodded, squeezing tighter. “In just a second. This is my foreplay.” He moved suddenly to cover Shion’s mouth and nose.

Shion’s whole body lurched, and a terrified, muffled noise escaped his throat.

Jay focussed in, eyes shining as Shion scrambled to try and remove Jay’s hands so he could breathe. There was no chance.

Shion’s body convulsed as he struggled to inhale and failed again and again. His fingers were twitching as he clawed at Jay’s hands, and his legs kicked violently.

“Just one more second,” Jay interrupted as Nezumi tried to tell him to stop. “He’ll relax in a second.”

“He’ll die,” Nezumi corrected.

“No,” Jay scoffed like that was ridiculous. “I won’t let him die.”

Shion’s struggling grew weaker and weaker as Jay held on for longer. Below his eyes were turning purple as his cheeks flushed red with anoxia.

That’s when Jay let go.

Shion gasped heavily, drawing breath after long overdue breath. Before he had a chance to recover, Jay twisted his other arm, spraining his good elbow as well.

Shion screamed and Nezumi winced at the sound of joints straining and twisting.

“Jay!” Nezumi shouted commandingly. “Stop it!”

“This is nothing compared to what they’ve done to us.” Jay said flatly. “This is not even justice.”

“We don’t need to hurt him,” Nezumi begged, looking at Shion’s shivering form. “The psychological torture of all this is really bad enough to-”

“Who  _ are  _ you?!” Jay turned to Nezumi incredulously. “I thought you were better than this!” He shot Nezumi a scathing look before turning back to Shion. “I’m barely hurting him, he’s getting off easy.” He groaned, “And so am I. This is fucking hot, regardless of your whining.”

Shion gasped in shallow breaths as he shook where he lay. “Ne-zu… H-help… me…”

Nezumi switched tactics. “You’re right,” he said to Jay. “I’m being sentimental. Fuck him up.”

Jay grinned, and leaned in to kiss Nezumi gently. “Fuck yeah.”

Shion managed to choke out one sob before Jay’s fist collided with the non-bruised side of his face.

_ I’m so sorry, Shion,  _ Nezumi thought as he tried to control the situation. He deepened his voice and reached out to stroke Jay’s hair. “That’s fucking sexy. Get over here.”

This managed to distract him. “Yeah?” Jay turned away from Shion, who was staring up at the ceiling with wide eyes, likely concussed.

“Yeah. Let’s fuck.” Nezumi laid down in bed and let Jay straddle him.

“Yeah,” Jay whispered seductively. “Let’s fucking do it.” He took both their cocks in his hand and thrust them together, groaning. “So fucking sexy.”

“Nnnmmm…” Nezumi groaned, trying to play it up.

“I wanna watch you kill him,” Jay said, reaching down to massage Nezumi’s entrance. “Then I want you to fuck me.”

“Mhm…” Nezumi shut his eyes, unable to face what was happening and trying to play it off as arousal. “Ah…” His cock leapt to attention as Jay found his prostate and rubbed. “Oh fuck…”

“There you go,” Jay murmured, then looked over at Shion. “I wanna hear him cry.” He reached over before Nezumi could do anything to twist Shion’s arm.

This seemed to snap Shion out of his concussed delirium, and caused him to burst into horrified tears, his chest shaking with pain and terror.

“That’s it.” Jay removed his fingers and pressed the head of his cock against Nezumi’s entrance before pushing in slowly. “Ahh…” He sighed as he seated himself. “My life is amazing.”

Nezumi swallowed roughly, trying to focus on the sensations of sex rather than the sound of Shion’s crying. He needed to look like he was into it if he was going to distract Jay enough to stop hurting Shion. “Ahh… right there,” he groaned as Jay began to move in and out, quickly finding a violent rhythm.

“Yeah, baby, you feel so good.” Jay moaned as he snapped his hips forward, causing Nezumi to see stars. “Can’t wait to watch you fucking blow his brains all over the place. Watch his eyes as he fucking eats it. Killing fascists… oh god…” Jay’s eyes were closed tight.

Nezumi reached out to take Shion’s hand, squeezing lightly as he waited for it to be over. He looked over at Shion, and waited as forced orgasm built in his stomach. He came staring at Shion’s injured, damaged form and tried not to cry as Jay continued to slam into him until he too came minutes later.

He stayed seated inside Nezumi for a long time, panting and staring at the ceiling. “Oh fuck,” he gasped as he finally pulled out. “That was so fucking good.” He smiled warmly down at Nezumi. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Nezumi managed to whisper back.

Jay laughed. “This has been a really good day.”


	6. Chapter 6

Spoonfuls of migraine-flavored soup were forced into Shion’s mouth as he lay limp on the couch. His arms were too injured to feed himself, and the concussion had sent him spinning out anyway. This was the third time they’d attempted to feed him today, he kept throwing up.

“We don’t actually need to feed him, Nez,” Jay sighed as he watched. “What’s the point in eating when you’re going to die?”

Nezumi shrugged. “If it does happen to be that we release him and kill ourselves, don’t we want him looking healthy?”

“No,” Jay scoffed. “We want him looking malnourished and injured. Better optics for next time they try to pull this shit.”

“I disagree,” Nezumi said simply.

“Well, whatever. You play house with him, I’m going to go smoke.” He stood and stuck a spliff in his mouth. “He’s just going to puke again.”

“Maybe not,” Nezumi countered weakly as Jay left the room.

Shion didn’t feel sick anymore, but his thinking still seemed weird. He wasn’t making much sense of anything, his thoughts weren’t lining up. “Done,” he said, mouth feeling a bit mushy as he struggled to speak. “Done.”

“You’ve eaten three bites,” Nezumi pointed out.

“Done,” Shion said again, unable to say anything more.

“Okay.” Nezumi set down the spoon. “Do you want something to drink?”

“No.” Shion was thoroughly confused. Not just because of the concussion, but because of the way Nezumi was behaving. He’d been so hot and cold trying to keep Jay from torturing him, it didn’t make sense. What did he want? Did he really want to see Shion injured? If so, why hadn’t he done more to help Jay hurt him? Did he not want to see Shion injured? If so, why had he allowed Jay to do what he did? It seemed Jay was in charge, which seemed strange for Nezumi. Shion had always seen him as dominant, but he was completely passive with Jay. Did that mean Jay was even scarier than Nezumi? What was he capable of? Maybe Nezumi wanted out. Maybe he didn’t even want to kill Shion, maybe he’d swoop in at the last second and rescue him from Jay. Maybe-

“Breaking news,” the TV interrupted his thoughts. “The president elect has been assassinated. Her body was recovered today from an undisclosed location, reportedly surrounded by the dead bodies of her captors, who have evidently killed themselves. This leaves the fate of Shion undetermined, as no evidence of him was found at the crime scene, leaving investigators speculating that he may have been kidnapped by an entirely different group of people. Will he be assassinated too? The Investigation Bureau is looking into all possibilities. As for now-” Nezumi shut off the TV, stood, and left the room without a word.

Shion was numb. So that was it. Kiwa was dead. His fate was sealed.

Jay walked back into the room, a stunned look on his face. “Kiwa’s dead…” He raised a shaking hand to his hair, running his fingers through it so it stood on end. “And Shion’s dead… and the kidnappers are dead… and I’m fucking dead.” He glanced at the door through which Nezumi had walked. “Where did he go?” Jay stumbled forward after Nezumi, cheeks sunken and pale.

Shion listened carefully as they spoke in the other room.

“Are you okay, Nez?”

“We gotta do it.”

“The other kidnappers killed themselves.”

“Yeah.”

“So should we kill ourselves?”

“No, let’s run.”

“Where?”

“They don’t know it was us, we just kill him and run. Pack your things.”

“Nezumi-”

“Now, Jay. We gotta do this now. Before they track us down.”

“What about our comrades?”

“They aren’t involved. They’ll burn the bunker once we’re gone, that’s why they have alibis.” Nezumi’s voice sounded weak. “We have to kill him now.”

“Agreed.”

They walked back into the room where Shion sat.

So, Nezumi wasn’t going to save him. Hope crushed, Shion slumped down on the couch and let the abject horror of his situation consume him. He could barely breathe. He choked on his own breath and shook uncontrollably, legs tensing and untensing as his migraine intensified, blinding him.

“Aw, poor baby.” The couch depressed and suddenly Jay’s arms were around him, rocking him back and forth. “It’ll be over soon.”

His captor, his torturer, was hugging him and comforting him. Shion, against his better judgement, felt a deep sense of gratitude, and ignored the pain in his arms as he hugged Jay back. They embraced for a long time. Jay stroked Shion’s hair and hummed softly to him.

“It’s okay, Shion,” Jay sang. “You’re so close to done, good job.”

Shion curled up in Jay’s lap, tucking his head into the crook of Jay’s neck. “No…” Shion moaned, unable to think of anything else to say. “No…” He opened his eyes to see Nezumi standing across the room, leaning against the wall, looking positively green. “Nezumi…”

Nezumi turned and left the room again, hand over his mouth.

The absence of thought. That’s what Shion was headed for. The absence of consciousness. Eternal non-being. Soon, at the pull of a trigger, by Nezumi’s hand, that’s all Shion would be. Death. It was approaching. Shion’s heart beat rapidly in his chest, as if trying to escape his body and live on somewhere else.

“Shh, baby. It’s okay.” Jay caressed him, and it felt oddly good. “No one’s gonna hurt you anymore.”

Nezumi stumbled back into the room minutes later, gun in hand, looking wrecked. “Let’s do this,” he gasped, eyes wide and mad. “Now.”

Shion was too afraid to move. He went floppy and collapsed onto the couch as Jay let him go. Soul gone.

“Pick him up,” Nezumi ordered Jay.

Jay nodded and wrenched Shion to his feet, sending pain coursing through his body so bad he almost passed out. Jay slapped his cheeks. “Wake up, Shion.”

Shion blinked, and struggled to stand. “Please…”

“Let’s go, sweetheart.” Jay led him outside, where a truck was waiting. “Right in the back there.” He buckled Shion in, and the seatbelt was the only thing that kept him upright.

Nezumi leapt into the driver’s seat.

“Sure you wanna drive?” Jay asked.

“Yup. Let’s go.” Nezumi revved the engine and took off the second Jay was seated.

“Woo!” Jay yelled and laughed. “Fantastic!” He looked at Nezumi lovingly. “I love you babe.”

“I love me too, let’s cap some fascists.” Nezumi grinned, speeding up.

Shion looked away. “I’m a fascist?”

“You’re  _ my  _ little fascist.” Jay looked back at him adoringly.

“I know fascism is a far right ideology, but I’m not that far right.” Shion looked down at his lap. “Am I?” He blinked rapidly. “If I’m so bad that Nezumi wants to kill me… What is my motivation? Why am I doing this? Who am I supporting? I know I’m right wing, but am I really…?” He shivered, suddenly very cold. “I’m supporting freedom of choice, I’m supporting freedom… Communism is… Socialism is… bad, right? Why do I think that? Am I really brainwashed? Am I really a fascist?”

“The sexiest fascist there is,” Jay said, laughing. “It’s great.”

Sudden realization struck Shion. “There’s another way. There’s another way. We can- we can coexist, just don’t kill me. None of us have to die.”

“We’re here.” Nezumi pulled the truck to a stop in the middle of the woods. “Everyone out, let’s get this over with.”

“But wait!” Shion cried out hysterically as Jay unbuckled him and helped him out of the truck. “Okay, so hear me out- there’s good things about capitalism, and there’s good things about communism, right? So let’s mix the two. Let’s find a middle ground. Let’s have a socialist framework around a limited market, let’s-” He let out a squeak and stopped talking as Nezumi cocked the gun. “No, no, no, no- we can work this out, there’s a third way, there’s options, we can- No!” Nezumi pointed the gun at Shion’s head. “Please, please let me talk. Let me just explain to you what I’m thinking and I’m sure you’ll see that none of this has to happen. We can-”

“Just shut up, Shion,” Nezumi said tiredly. “This is what has to happen.”

Shion’s concussed brain was working in overdrive. “No, wait, just give me a minute, just let me explain to you what we can-”

Nezumi stepped forward and Shion scampered backward with a terrified squeak. Nezumi’s shoulders drooped. “If you run I can’t shoot you in the head. You’ll suffer more.”

Shion was hyperventilating. “Shoot Jay! Let’s run away together! Forget this shit, let’s do like we used to, let’s go back to how things were when we were sixteen- hiding from the government, reading books, talking to mice, the classic dynamic, right?! Kill Jay, he’s clearly the evil one here.”

Jay rolled his eyes. “Just shoot him, Nezumi. We don’t need to drag this out, he’s going to keep begging for his life.”

Nezumi glanced at Jay then nodded. “You’re right. It’s cruel to keep this going.” He aimed the gun at Shion’s head and took another step forward.

Shion fell a few more steps back. “Nezumi, please! I- I’ll never run for any office again, I’ll vote communist, I’ll- I’ll disappear off the map! You’ll never hear from me again, the media can think I’m dead, no one has to know!”

Nezumi’s stony expression never wavered, but tears ran down his cheeks. “I’m sorry.”

“No!” Shion screamed.

There was one loud bang.

 

******

 

Screams filled the air, blending into a dull ringing in Nezumi’s ears. It was only after a long moment that he realized he was screaming too. Everyone was.

Shion, with his hands over his ears, Jay with a bullet in his knee, and Nezumi with the smoking gun in his hands.

“Get in the truck, Shion!” Nezumi ran forward and shoved Shion into the truck as Jay staggered and fell to the ground.

“You fucker! What the hell is wrong with you?!” Jay cried, hands shaking around the bullet wound in his leg. “How could you?!”

Nezumi strapped Shion into the driver’s seat and handed him the keys. “Get the hell out of here. Go home.”

“What?!” Shion gasped. “Come with me!”

Nezumi shook his head. “I’m done. I’m not running anymore.” He pressed the gun to his temple. “Go away now. Please. Go see your mom. Tell her you’re okay, tell her… tell her I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Just one twitch of the finger and he wouldn’t have to think about it anymore.

“Wait!” Jay screamed. “Kill me first, you asshole, I’ll bleed out if you leave me here.”

Nezumi opened his eyes and glanced at Shion, who still sat frozen behind the wheel. “Okay.” He aimed the gun at Jay’s head.

“Hold on.” Jay took a cigarette and a lighter out of his pocket and lit it. He took a couple deep drags and glared at Nezumi. “Oka-”

_ Bang _

The bullet pierced Jay’s skull, and he keeled over backwards to lie broken on the ground, blood gushing from the back of his head.

Nezumi spared Jay’s body only a moment’s glance before turning back to Shion and pressing the gun to his own temple. “Please leave, I don’t want you to see this.”

Shion hesitated, then nodded. “Okay. Okay. But Nezumi, nobody has to know. You can come back with me. Nobody has to know you were involved. Let’s blame it on Jay.”

“No. No way,” Nezumi insisted. “I’m on tape with him. I have no alibi. I’ll go down.”

“Then go to prison!” Shion begged.

“Hell no.” Nezumi shook his head. “I’m done, Shion. I’m out. You have to go.”

“But…” Shion looked terrified. “But survivors are the victors.”

“Yeah, and I fucking lost.” Nezumi groaned in frustration. “Get the hell out of here or I’ll kill myself in front of you!”

“What about communism?!” Shion sounded desperate.

“The cause is not lost because of me.”

“I’ll run with you!” Shion sobbed. “I’ll run away with you forever!”

“I can’t have you do that.”

“I’ll kill myself!” Shion cried. “If you pull the trigger I will next!”

Nezumi’s blood ran cold. “Bullshit.”

Shion’s eyes widened as he clearly realized he’d won some ground. “I swear I will.”

Nezumi shook himself. Clearly this was bullshit. “Whatever, Shion. If you don’t leave now I’m pulling the trigger in front of you. If you chose to kill yourself afterward, that’s your prerogative. I’m not doing this for your life, I’m doing it to spare myself prison.”

Shion hesitated again, and that way all it took.

“Goodbye, Shion. I love you.” Nezumi pulled the trigger.

 

******

 

Nezumi’s body fell quickly. In movies, it always seemed to last an eternity, but a second after the blast, Nezumi was on the ground. Shion stared, unable to scream as he slowly processed what was happening around him. Here he was, with two dead bodies before him, still concussed and injured, lost somewhere in the woods.

A deep migraine shot through his skull, pulling his hands to the sides of his head in pain. He groaned, shutting his eyes to the carnage around him as grief began to set in.

Shion’s knees gave out and he dropped to the forest floor, heart pressing against his throat. He felt dizzy, and couldn’t open his eyes lest he see the world spin before him. It was agony, the confusion and pain and heartbreak- he didn’t know how to bear it, it felt like he was being ripped apart at the seams.

Minutes later, when Shion regained some semblance of sense, he realized he needed to deal with this situation. The first step was… it was… he could barely think. He needed to find a way out of these woods. He needed help. He needed to call someone, was there something in the truck that could help him? He stood shakily, hunched over himself like an old man. He sifted through the junk in the backseat of the car, hands shaking and sprained elbows jolting painfully until his fingertips struck something smooth and square.

It was a phone. A powered off and probably jailbroken old phone with a cracked screen. Shion tapped on the ancient technology, not one hundred percent sure how to use it. He’d never used a phone in his life, at least not in as long as he could remember.

However, he had read up on old technology, and probably the best way to turn the thing on would be to…

He pressed both of the buttons, holding them down until the screen ignited with blue light. An icon showing low battery flashed, jolting something anxious in Shion’s stomach. He switched it open, trying to remember anyone’s call number. He wasn’t even sure how to call an emergency line, he’d always relied on his wristband’s automatic features. There was an icon that looked like an old phone. Shion clicked on it and watched as a number pad emerged on the cracked screen.

Thankfully, there was a small emergency symbol at the bottom of the screen. He clicked on it, and the line began to ring.

He blinked through the tears that sprung to his eyes as the line connected.

“What is your emergency?”

“H-hi. I’m Shion. I’m lost in the woods, and my kidnappers are dead. Please… do something.”

“Do you know where you are?”

“No.”

“Do you know where you came from?”

“No.”

“Okay. We’ll try to track your location. Stay on the line.”

“Okay.” Shion shuddered, suddenly very cold. “They shot themselves.”

“We’re sending police.”

“I didn’t… I didn’t do anything.”

“We’ve got your location, the police are on their way, along with an ambulance.”

“Okay.” Shion stared at the dead bodies of his kidnappers. “I just want to go home.”

“We’re on our way. Try to stay calm.”

“He didn’t want me dead, he saved my life, please don’t… He saved me.”

“Who saved you? Is there someone else there?”

“No. He died. He’s… he shot himself. Jay didn’t- Nezumi just… He saved my life, I don’t think he wanted any of this. I think he was just in too deep. He got swept up with the revolution, that’s what happens. When the poor are oppressed. It’s been his whole life, it used to be… I used to…”

That’s when Shion’s heart changed.

“I used to care. What happened to me? If only I had… Nezumi wouldn’t… They’re willing to die for this, because we’ve kept them down for so long. They have nothing left to lose. I do. That’s why I didn’t…” Shion’s breath was coming more and more rapidly. “I need to change everything.”

“The police are on their way, just stay where you are. Are you ready to hang up?”

Shion nodded. “Yes. Thank you.” He clicked the button and the woman on the line was gone.

He was shivering. “Why am I clinging to capital? What am I doing?” The chills overtook him and he laid down on the ground, freezing. “I need to change everything.”

The EMS and police arrived some twenty minutes later.

“Are you okay?” A young med tech took Shion’s shoulder where he lay on the ground and shook him lightly.

“I’m fine,” Shion said, pushing himself up. “I just want to go home.”

“We’re taking you to a hospital, get you checked out. You have bruises all over your face.”

“Oh. Okay.” Shion was disappointed. “I guess that’s alright.”

He watched as Jay and Nezumi were photographed where they lay before being zipped into body bags. Shion’s gut twisted as they were taken into the ambulance. The desperate urge to reach out and grab them away was hard to bite back. He himself was loaded in after them, where an EMS worker inspected his elbows.

“Definitely sprained. How’d you sprain both your elbows?”

“He did it to me,” Shion said dully. “Jay. He tortured us. He’s the one… he’s the bad one, okay? Not Nezumi. I don’t want his name to be… Nezumi saved my life.”

The man nodded. “Well, we’ll get you fixed up as best we can. Unfortunately there’s not a lot to do for a sprain other than wait for it to heal.”

“Okay,” Shion whispered. One step at a time, he’d fix everything. He’d make this right. He’d do what Nezumi wanted, he’d make sure his death wasn’t in vain.

He just needed to get back to the city.


End file.
